The Time Before Dawn

Random Things Worth Noting

2012-02-15T18:02:00.000-08:00

Anna does not like tags. She actually lives with them well on her own clothing where they are not visible to her. It's not exactly about comfort. It seems to be about aesthetics. Her dolls, stuffed animals, doll clothes - almost all of them have been operated on with my scissors so as to be free of any unsightly tags.

Lately the post-dinner ritual includes Anna and Blake rough-housing before bath. This includes dancing and racing or flying around the "track" from our kitchen to foyer to family room and back. It also recently includes Anna playing bumble bee and 'stinging' Blake with her butt, Blake falling to the ground in a blithering heap, and Anna returning to hug and kiss his stung body part. She's quick to sting him again.

Anna has been eating lettuce, spinach, and kale like it's candy. I'm a little weary of saying these words out loud - I don't want it to stop. She asks for second helpings of these vegetables almost every time we eat them, loaded of course with the most expensive aged balsamic vinegar around.

Last week Anna was obsessed with the old "new" animal carrier toy we found. More than a year ago Blake's supervisor invited us over, and we were gifted a little animal cage. Anna's little blue dog, the one Mo D found that is a replica of her big blue dog, needed a crate like Riley's. When we pulled it out of hiding, she spent DAYS playing with Ocho, the little blue dog. She filled the crate with handfuls of toys, took them out, put them back in, and took them out again more times than I could count. She was ecstatic about this.

While Anna still loves diapering her dolls, she's been more and more focused on building and designing. She builds with her legos, she makes boxes and homes out of her magna-tiles for her plastic bugs and lego animals and stickers, she creates intricate designs with her pop beads. I often find surprises waiting for me in magnetic pyramids and cubes that are laying around.

Before I fall asleep at night, before I even open my book to read, I've been in the habit of spending at least a few minutes browsing the latest celebrity news on my iPhone People app. Everyday. I usually skip Facebook, I don't have a Twitter account, I'm just dabbling on Pinterest. The People app gets most of my attention. Not exactly sure what this says about me.

I'm fourteen weeks pregnant tomorrow. Outside of the craziness of the last week or so, and the exhaustion that I still feel, I haven't been very focused on the pregnancy. I kinda even feel a little guilty about it, the lack of attention given to the little one growing inside me, that is. It's definitely good in a way, though. With Anna, I was a typical first time pregnant mom, obsessed with all the details. This time, I've done little to no reading or reminding myself of the 'shoulds' (which creates less anxiety), and I have yet to think about the nursery or things I'll need to buy this time around. I'm focused mostly on the day-to-day, staying busy with Anna and with life. I can see how a second child will be easier, with respect to worrying less about their fragility and how you care for them as a newborn. I can see how a second child is harder, though, too. The fatigue of raising one and housing a developing new one in my body is just a preview.

Speaking of this, I think the laziness Blake and I've been tending towards must be our way of stocking up while we still have the freedom. Neither of us are too motivated to do much of anything after Anna goes to bed...at 7pm! The kitchen usually gets cleaned to some degree by Blake if I cooked. They toys do not get picked up regularly. The mail is mostly ignored. The non-emergency items on the To Do list get moved from one day to the next to the next. The tools used for hanging pictures two weeks ago are still sitting on the chair. On another chair are the remnants of my reframing project. The top of the garbage can that's been blowing around in our yard? It's found a permanent place in the grass behind the deck. This is NOT my preferred way of keeping house. The cleaning people come tomorrow, though, so if you want to visit, come soon.

Somehow it's escaped this blog that we finally decided on a preschool for Anna next year. It was, for me, an agonizing decision. There's no "right" answer, but oh, I wished for one. In the end, the pros outweighed the cons (like the drive time and the lack of emphasis on time outside, which I figure Anna gets plenty of at home). And, ultimately, none of the other options FELT as right as this one. We're thrilled in so many ways about the school she'll be attending. She's actually pretty excited, too. The classroom even has a pet guinea pig, Professor, which was a major draw for her. The 25-minute drive though! When my pregnancy insomnia is in full swing as it was last week, I start questioning the logistics of afternoon (11:55am) drop off and (3:00pm) pick up with naps for a six or nine month old.

Happy Valentine's Day

2012-02-14T10:42:00.000-08:00

Blake and I have been together for almost 10 years, and we have not yet celebrated Valentine's Day. I can't remember exactly how the conversation went so many years ago, but Blake basically said he felt like it was just another "Hallmark holiday," and that it would make more sense, if we really wanted to celebrate our love, to do it on a day that has meaning for us. I thought this was a fine idea, so, we made our own day of celebration on November 1st, the anniversary of when we started dating.

Every year on November 1st, I gave Blake a letter reflecting on our previous year together. Every year, we'd have a date night to celebrate. The year after Anna was born, the letter didn't come until December, and there was no date night planned. The year after that, I think we both forgot about November 1st entirely. Until today I actually thought last year was the first year that I failed to write the letter. I went searching for them on our computers, and 2008 was the last to be found (I'm still searching for 03 and 04 as well, which I KNOW were written). That's how quickly time is moving in our lives.

The moral of this story, for me, is that while Valentine's Day might hold more meaning when it's on a day special to us, we apparently could benefit from the reminder from television, restaurants, co-workers, friends, classmates, and Hallmark that the day to celebrate our love is upon us. Since November 1st came and went again this year, I've decided to break the rules and write a letter to Blake on Valentine's Day.

And, with Anna at the age where she hears about this kind of thing and gets excited about it all, she and I also made a few little gifts for Blake.

These yarn hearts were a Pinterest discovery at this website. The cornstarch glue was much thicker than I expected, so we just "painted" it onto the yarn with our fingers. We did speed the drying process by putting them in the oven. Fun, easy, and adorable!

I think I saw this frame idea initially on Pinterest as well, but my friend's recent post reminded me of it. I just printed text on some heavy-weight scrapbook paper, cut it to the appropriate size, and put it in an old frame. With a dry erase marker we can take turns writing messages for each other, and maybe for ourselves as well. It's my hope that the frame will help us nurture our relationship a little bit more every day of the year, not just on special occasions.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Spiritual Statistics

2012-02-09T12:36:00.000-08:00

As of late, I've been wishing for some way to understand just how science and nature, or spirit, work together, or not. What's causing all the philosophical rumination? A baby, of course!

We can finally announce here on the blog that our family of three is expecting another baby in mid-August. It feels good to be able to write about it. It is, after all, a big part of what's happening in our lives, and it's been noticeably absent from this record for the last thirteen weeks.

We shared the news with Anna this weekend, which was, for us, so very exciting and special. I'd prepared myself for some very tough questions, but I think those will be coming later. Throughout the day, after we told her, we could literally see questions forming on her face. They were all about the baby, though. She was so focused on having a REAL baby in the house, one that can REALLY have his or her diaper changed, one that will cry, eat, sleep, poop, and drink milk. She is so excited to be a big sister. We are so excited for her. Of course, we're excited for us, too.

As far as the pregnancy goes, I've been so fortunate NOT to have morning sickness. I have been extremely and typically exhausted, moreso than last time. I've also been having more cravings than I did with Anna...pickles (cliche, I know), mustard, carbs carbs carbs, ice cream, chocolate please. Forget the veggies I usually love.

This pregnancy has it's own challenges, though. I feel like this one's been all about statistics...three percent, four percent, five percent. Our baby has a three percent chance of developing heart block due to an antibody I have in my blood. We have already made agonizing decisions about treatment if this were to develop, decisions which, to me, seem out the realm of any parents decision-making ability. Due to my "advanced maternal age," or as I like to call it, the geriatric pregnancy, we were offered a First Trimester Screening to assess our baby's risk chromosomal abnormalities. This revealed the baby has a four percent chance of having Down's Syndrome. And, after two days of spotting this week, we were told we still have a five percent chance of having a miscarriage. While the odds seem to be in our favor, the risks for heart block and DS are much higher than in the average population. And as our high-risk doctor pointed out, the only numbers that make a parent feel any relief are 0 percent and 100 percent. Needless to say, Blake and I have struggled to find peace and calm these last few weeks.

A conversation with a dear friend this weekend helped me to remember some things, things that we can easily lose sight of in our medicalized society: 1) While there is so much we know about pregnancy and keeping mom and baby healthy, there's a lot that cannot be explained. It is, after all, a miraculous process unfolding inside; 2) We have very little control. We can do a lot to ensure a healthy pregnancy, but there are some things we can do absolutely nothing about. What will be, will be; 3) Trust the process. Trust that we will be able to handle whatever comes. I've been reminding myself to trust myself, too.

I'm hopeful that the next six months will be full of anticipation, joy, nesting, and peace. The time has already been passing quickly. August will be here soon. For now, I'm asking myself, "How do I want to use my energy?" This is my mantra for this pregnancy.

Art Space

2012-02-06T08:42:00.000-08:00

Since we've moved into this house, I've wanted a creative way to display Anna's artwork. She is constantly creating, so the art is always changing, and I've been searching for a way to easily take the older pictures down and put up newer ones. I finally found what I was looking for. Our new art boards were inspired by a book on my bedside table, The Creative Family, and a pin on Pinterest.

Last weekend we bought an 8 foot, 1x4 wood board, some primer, paint, a few screws, picture hangers, sandpaper, and some binder clips. We had Lowe's cut the board in half for us. Blake primed and painted the boards. I sanded the edges to give them a distressed look. Then Blake put the picture hangers on the back and screws equally spaced on the front. Once the boards were hanging on the wall, I placed the binder clips, with artwork, on the screws. Simple - although it did take some time over the course of two weekends.

Next up...a way to organize all the art supplies around here.

Dessert for Breakfast

2012-02-05T16:42:00.000-08:00

It's hard to get a good picture of your food when you cannot wait to take a bite.

Aunt Kaity babysat Friday night so that Blake and I could go out with some dear friends who are moving back east. On our way home that night we picked up the other Katie from her friend's house, and she spent Saturday morning visiting with us before heading back to Chicago. It was a perfect reason to make dessert for breakfast, something we've been meaning to do for a while.

Blake made these homemade apple fritters from Thomas Keller's Ad Hoc at Home cookbook a while back, but they contain whole milk. To make a dairy-free version, he substituted vanilla flavored almond milk in equal quantities, and the fritters turned out just as decadent as before. Here's the slightly adapted recipe:

1 cup all-purpose flour
2 Tbsp granulated sugar
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1/8 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp kosher salt
1 large egg
1/2 cup plus 1 Tbsp vanilla flavored almond milk
2 large apples, we used Honeycrisp and Pink Lady (Ad Hoc calls for 3, but we only ended up doing 2 and used more batter with each fritter)
Canola oil for deep-frying
Powdered sugar for dusting

Whisk together the flour, sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, and salt in a medium bowl. Lightly beat the egg and milk in a small bowl. Whisk into the dry ingredients until combined. The batter can be covered and refrigerated for up to 3 hours.

Peel the apples and slice the fruit from the core. Cut the apples into 2-inch-long, 1/4-inch-thick matchsticks. Fold into the batter.

Heat about 1 1/2 inches of oil to 325 degrees in a wide deep pot (we used our large Le Crueset). Set a cooling rack over a backing sheet and line with paper towles. Using two forks, lift up about 5-6 of the apple matchsticks from the batter, allowing the excess batter to drip back into the bowl - the fritter should be irregular in shape, with just a very light coating of batter - and add to the hot oil. Add a few more fritters to the pot, without crowding, and fry for about 5 minutes, turning the fritters from time to time, until crisp and golden brown. Use a skimmer or slotted spoon to transfer them to the paper towels, and fry the remaining fritters in batches.

Stack the fritters on serving platter, sprinkle generously with powdered sugar, and serve immediately.

Buzzy

2012-02-02T16:27:00.000-08:00

Anna loves to dress up in her various bird or bug costumes. On Wednesday, after reading a story in which Abby Cadaby poofs herself into a bumble bee for Halloween, Anna decided she really needs a bumble bee costume. I told her we could put it on her birthday list. Then, we both realized that we could put together a makeshift costume quite easily.

We stopped at JoAnn's before our grocery trip on Wednesday to buy a few supplies. My goals, other than to whip something up with very little time or money involved, were to have Anna participate as much as possible and to let her be the designer. This is what we came up with:

All of the color ideas (yellow thread, green and blue antennae, multi-colored stripes, wing 'decorations') were Anna's, of course. Adding designs to the wings with colorful felt that she cut out all by herself was her idea as well. I saw the duct tape idea online, and we just happened to have the colorful stuff on hand already. For a couple of hours and less than $20, we have a very happy buzzing, flying, stinging bee in our house. She's also quite proud of her work, as am I. It was so fun to observe her thinking about what colors to put where, to watch her painting foam balls with such focus and intensity, to work together on stitching the wings.

I have a feeling she's going to be coming up with more ideas like this one soon.

This is what a bumble bee looks like when she says "Bzzzzzzz!"

Vinyl

2012-02-01T18:38:00.000-08:00

I think I mentioned in a previous post that Blake received a couple of vinyl records for Christmas. After he told me that he had some interest in establishing a collection, I scoured the Ann Arbor record stores for a couple of used gems. Blake was thrilled with his first U2 and Van Morrison LPs, and quickly found a turntable on Craig's List. Thanks to my dad, Blake also secured a receiver and speakers that were sitting idle.

Until yesterday, we'd been listening mostly to one of four records, mostly Elvis actually (which Blake picked up a few weeks ago), because Anna LOVES dancing to Blue Suede Shoes and Jailhouse Rock. We've all been LOVING having this new toy in our home.

Papa and Mo Mox came for a visit last night, and they brought a surprise with them...a small collection of vintage records. Blake and I were beaming. The Eagles, more Elvis, oldies upon oldies upon oldies, even some of my old childhood records. We spent the evening in the basement by the record player, talking with my dad and Jessica, listening to old albums.

Thank you so much, Dad and Jessica, for saving these for so thirty years (or more) and passing them on to us. They will be enjoyed for a lifetime.

Some of my favorites:

The American Graffiti soundtrack!

More Elvis

1979 Neil Diamond

These brought back memories.

Seven Months Later...

2012-01-30T10:30:00.000-08:00

This is what our den/TV room looked like for the last seven months (seven months!) since we moved into this house:

We've had boxes and boxes of books stacked up, with no place to put them. For seven months, we've been deliberating about what to do about a bookshelf. They are SO expensive and not really in the budget. We finally found a great option at Ikea for less than $200, so last weekend we picked it up, put it together, and I've been working on unpacking books for the last week. I'm so much happier with this room. We still need to mount the TV on the wall, get another chair (or a love seat), a new lamp, some art work, drapes...none of that will happen for a while, but in the meantime, it's SO much more comfortable!

Go Bowling

2012-01-28T16:56:00.000-08:00

After too many dreary winter days, we've been craving something fun and different to do together. Today, we decided to try bowling.

It's been at least four years since Blake and I have been bowling. We walked into the bowling alley and felt like we'd walked into a different era. Is it a requirement that all bowling alleys have black lights and neon everywhere? Must they play Poison, Warrant, and Motley Crue music non-stop? I won't lie - I knew the words to every song and didn't mind it all too much.

Anna took no time to warm up to the game. We helped her roll the ball down the lane with bumpers for the first game. She insisted we stay for a second game, and she insisted on doing it herself before it was done. Blake performed amazingly for his first time in years. I improved greatly with the second game, which wasn't tough to do. It didn't matter how we bowled, though - we had an incredibly fun time today, and look forward to doing it again.

Who knew the bowling alley had so many good photo opportunities...

They even had shoes her size!

My favorite.

Glowing shoelaces.

Blake's amazing first game. Mine...not so much.

I redeemed myself a little bit in the second game.

Spontaneous

2012-01-25T17:54:00.000-08:00

Spontaneity is not one of my top five strengths. It's probably not in my top 20. Sometimes, though, I am spontaneous. It's usually weeks like this one, when it feels like something must shift, when the clouds won't budge, our energy is zapped, and I'm craving a change.

Blake and I decided that Anna and I could use a little trip. We didn't have anything we HAD to do on Tuesday or Wednesday, so I called Mo D first thing Tuesday morning to see if we could drive up for a quick visit. I packed in record time, which was still slowly, and I forgot Anna's pajamas, but she's happy to sleep in her clothes. We've eaten spaghetti and more junk food than usual and breakfast for dinner. I met an old, dear friend for lunch. Anna and Mo swam. I walked on the treadmill. We've all colored - a lot. We've walked and played with and petted Riley. I haven't thought to much about To Do lists or the gray weather. And, when it came time to go home today, I received a text message from Blake telling me to stay another day if it felt good to do so. So, we did, even though we'll miss playschool tomorrow morning.

It was just what we needed this week. We're missing Blake, though. It's been a restful, relaxing little getaway, and it will be so good to get back to Daddy tomorrow night. Thanks, Mo, for welcoming us at the last minute!

Happy

2012-01-23T17:33:00.000-08:00

We were all very, very happy to have Katie arrive for a visit on Sunday afternoon. She's in town for work, and fortunately, she was able to come stay and play for the day and night. Anna kept her busy in the snow, with toys, and at bedtime, and after Anna (finally) fell asleep, Blake, Katie and I enjoyed second dinner, wine, and catching up.

Thank you, Katie, for spending time with us!

From the (Dirty) Bathroom Window

2012-01-21T16:46:00.000-08:00

A winter rainbow (not nearly as spectacular in the photo as it was in the sky).

Blue shadows in the snow.

I didn't quite capture the sparkly snow falling outside...it was beautiful.

The Thistle-Though

2012-01-18T17:23:00.000-08:00

I don't know how to say this without sounding trite, but Anna is growing up frighteningly fast. While she's always been a verbal kid, recently it seems she is articulate beyond her years. I find that, because of her vocabulary and clear pronunciation, I often forget I'm speaking to a three-year-old.

It's been ages since I posted an "Anna says..." blog, maybe because she speaks so much like us now. She says lots of cute things, but the frequency of the quirky ones is less than it used to be I guess. The only word I can think of that she pronounces differently now is "yellow," which she calls "lellow" simply out of habit. If we ask her to say it properly, she will. SO, I want to take every opportunity to remember her as a little, little girl.

After Christmas (not during, for whatever reason) Anna started singing "A Holly, Jolly Christmas" in her bed at night or just around the house as she'd color or change Ella's diaper. I giggle and fill with joy every time I hear her sing her version of the song, which she knows is not the real version, but she continues, I'm sure, because she knows I love it so much.

Here is her version, sung to the real melody and with much enthusiasm:

Have a holly, jolly Christmas
It's the best time of the year.
I don't know if there'll be snow
And everyone you meet.
Oh, ho the thistle-though
Hung where you can see.
Somebody waits for you
Deserve once for me.
Have a holly, jolly Christmas this year.

Here and Gone

2012-01-17T13:58:00.000-08:00

The snow, that is. Thankfully, we were able to milk two short episodes of fun out of the minimal snowfall we received in southeast Michigan. With just three days of snow play, it is, in my estimation, the worst winter I can remember as far as beauty and time outside is concerned. It's been raining more than snowing...in mid January! I'm so ready for snow, and LOTS of it.

Anna and Blake took advantage of the short-lived accumulation on Saturday morning while I renewed my CPR certification and took a Spinning class.

Anna informed me that she was eating snow while Daddy took this picture.

On Sunday, Emily, Michael, Harper, and Crosby came over for a short sledding adventure. It was very cold and windy, but it was fun, nonetheless. We warmed up inside and shared dinner after sledding - a perfect way to spend Sunday on our long weekend.

I still can't believe Crosby will be 1 year in March already!

The guys

Harper trekking back to the house.

You Can

2012-01-13T16:36:00.000-08:00

Waiting patiently for class to start

Today Anna danced. She danced in a blue leotard with pink tights. She decided on the blue leotard, and she alone made the decision to take a dance class.

Months ago, after watching a Super Why! episode where one of the characters was learning how to dance, she declared that she, too, wanted to take a dance class. Shortly thereafter, a Living Social deal came through my inbox for a little dance studio in Dexter. I cringed just a little bit as I dialed the number to sign her up for Happy Dancing Feet, a combination tap, ballet, and tumbling class for toddlers. Dancing is a wonderful art and sport; it's just that it's so often the breeding ground for body image issues in young girls. I know it's silly when she's only 3.5 years old. Given my history, though, it's where my head goes. BUT, she wasn't asking to take a martial arts class or yoga or golf lessons. She wanted to dance.

We visited the class just before the holidays to be sure we knew what she was getting into. We watched a very patient teacher wrangle 6 or 7 toddlers around a mirrored room, and despite the intermittent craziness, Anna insisted she wanted to try it. As the first class crept closer, she grew more and more excited, and a little bit nervous. Last night she was up constantly, yelling down the hall, "Is it morning, YET?!" Or she'd exclaim, "If I slip or fall down, I'll be OK," and "I can't wait to meet my dance teacher." She articulately informed us that, just like with our first new playgroup yesterday, she might be a little bit nervous or worried at the beginning, but she would feel more comfortable later on. She was absolutely right.

Blake had the day off today, so we both sat in awe, peering through the one-way window to see her tapping, shuffling, galloping, and hopping. She participated in everything, tried everything, and didn't give up even when things were challenging for her. It was so very different from swimming lessons. She was absolutely focused on everything the teacher instructed and took to her quite quickly. She was still her reserved-in-groups, observant, attentive self, AND she was determined and brave and more comfortable in her own skin than I've ever seen when she's with other kids. She even held hands with some little girls she didn't even know when they formed a circle...something she has not done in other settings. She was serious about learning AND she was having so much fun. Blake and I were just so happy for her, happy that she was happy, happy that she truly enjoyed something and felt good about herself in doing it.

After class, we treated Anna to a special spaghetti lunch at a restaurant in town, since she's been wanting to "eat at a restaurant for breakfast, lunch, or dinner." She shared what she learned and what she loved, and she reminded us what we've always told her: "I can do anything I set my mind and heart to."

Yes, Anna, you can.

Oh, and here's a cute little video of the girls doing their pliés...

Kindness

2012-01-09T16:57:00.000-08:00

Anna and I drive downtown almost every Monday evening when I teach Spinning, we park the car in a metered spot around Kerrytown, and we stop in to see our friend Jake before Blake picks Anna up for their evening together.

Anna loves to put the money in the meters when we park. Quite often, if I happen to have enough change to do so, I'll suggest that we add some money to the meter of the car that's parked next to us, especially if their meter has run out.

Today, before we even parked the car, Anna excitedly asked, "Can I put the money in the meter?"

"Of course," I replied.

Then, she filled my heart. Unprompted, she asked "Can we put money in the other meter, too, for the other car who needs it?"

I beamed as I rummaged around in my purse for change, sadly pulling out just enough to get us through until Blake arrived. "We don't have enough. I suppose we could go into this store and get change for a dollar, though." I honestly figured she'd be in a hurry to see Jake and not interested in another stop along the way.

She replied in a very determined, matter-of-fact tone. "Yes, yes, mom. We should definitely do that."

And, we did. And, she (and I) smiled proudly and happily as she filled up an empty parking meter for someone we don't know.

Sometimes, even when you feel like they may be learning by example only the things you wish they'd forget you've done, they surprise you.

In the First Week...

2012-01-08T17:12:00.000-08:00

The sunrise the first week of January

There were multiple days of sunshine. In January. Without snow.

There were no classes to attend, so we did what we wanted and when most days: Jump City with Emily, Harper and Crosby, a trip to the mall for dance shoes and returns, out to lunch, lots and lots of bead time, hide and seek outside, painting piggies, Candyland for the first time.

We ate chicken tortilla soup, sloppy joes, three bean chili, vegetable coconut curry, slow cooked pork shoulder and grits.

We wrote thank you notes, pondered and finally decided on a Florida vacation, sent our New Year cards, got groceries twice, recycled our bags and bags of glass at a place I just discovered right by our house, washed sheets for the first time in I don't know how long (is that gross?), and had friends over for dinner.

I did not fold the multiple loads of laundry that sat (and still sit) in laundry baskets, did not go through the pile of mail, and did not get caught up on my e-mail.

We took down all the indoor Christmas decorations, put Christmas toys away, and relished a de-cluttered, clean house (if only for a day). I'm so grateful for the women that clean our house.

We took a family run in the sunshine, three smiling faces jogging down the street, Anna breathless and giggling the entire way.

I saw a movie alone on Sunday afternoon and cried nearly the entire time. The Descendants. Amazing performances, phenomenal film. But, it will make you cry.

We slept restlessly. Anna woke nearly every night this week, and stayed up for lengths of time that I'd forgotten were possible.

Anna and I took the occasional nap. See above.

Failed (or still have a lot to learn, depending on your perspective) at being a more patient mother. Again, see above.

Anna had an appointment at the doctor. She's grown over one inch in the last three months.

I ran twice in the sunshine, once if fifty-four degree weather.

Anna picked out a bright blue leotard and skirt for her first ever dance class next Friday. Black or pink? Not a chance. I hope this place is relaxed about their dancing attire.

I felt mostly present. I enjoyed the happy moments and felt excited about the year ahead.

Reflections and Planning, 2012

2012-01-07T06:15:00.000-08:00

I haven't felt entirely motivated to reflect on 2011 or set goals for 2012. In the past, at least on this blog, I've focused solely on that: goals. The year, though, hasn't been just about goals, and I'm feeling like a different kind of look back and ahead. After reading Amy's and Stephanie's New Year posts, I felt inspired to follow the trend of answering some questions to prompt my reflection. I've never actually done this, and for some reason, it feels a bit intimidating, maybe even embarrassing (like when I have to admit how apolitical I am or how I'm a Twilight fan). At any rate, after a 3 mile run in fifty-four degree, sun-shiny weather this afternoon, I feel ready to tackle it. So, here goes:

What did you do in 2011 that you'd never done before?
I ran my first race. I also ran my first 10k race at a pace of 8:46 per mile. Blake and I took our first adults-only vacation to NYC and spent an embarrassing amount of money on a once-in-a-lifetime meal at one of the best restaurants in the country. We experienced U2 live. I took my first photography lesson and my first ever acting class. I took all dairy out of my own diet for four months and have maintained dairy-free cooking at home for almost a year. I sewed a skirt for Anna. We sold our first home and renovated parts of our new home. Made a fairy house with Anna. Saw the Nutcracker. Bought vinyl records for Blake for Christmas.

Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I set a number of goals at the beginning of last year, including getting 7-8 hours of sleep per night, devoting at least one hour on average to sewing projects per week, integrating meditation into my daily routine, finding a spiritual community, and intentionally creating more fun in our daily lives. I definitely got 7 hours of sleep much more reliably this year. I also sewed quite a bit...a skirt for Anna, eye pillows for the Mo's, bird ornaments, scarves...but not until AFTER the move. The house-selling, buying, renovating, and moving put a kink in a few of my goals, actually. It took up a lot of my time. Sadly, I did not make meditation a habit, and we are still searching for a spiritual community. While I don't have a way to measure whether I achieved my "fun" goal, I do feel like we made and had more fun this year. I set and achieved other goals after the new year, like finishing a 10k with a less than 10-minute-mile pace.

This year I still have the meditation and spiritual community goals in my mind. Looking back at last year's post, I mentioned wanting to navigate life's transitions with a little less stress and a little more calm, and I think both of these goals would help with that. I'm feeling particularly nostalgic right now and aware of the passage of time, so living more mindfully and embracing the present moment is a top priority. I'm not yet sure how I'll measure that or define it's achievement, but it's something I aspire to do, regardless. I'd also like to work on being a more patient, positive wife and mother. On a smaller scale, I'd like to explore more creative writing, maybe take another acting class, and decorate our house.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
Nobody in my immediate or extended family. I have a number of friends who've had babies this year...four in our book club alone (hence, the stork club) and one of my oldest friends as well.

Did anyone close to you die?
My grandma.

Where did you travel in 2011?
All over Michigan, including Ludington in the summer. Rochester, NY for Blair and Carolyn's wedding. NYC. Palm Beach, Florida for a family vacation. Chicago for our annual "Sprite" reunion.

What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Nothing from a material perspective. We are immeasurably blessed. I think "more time" always pops into my mind. More patience, definitely. More quality conversations and connection with my husband.

What dates or images from 2011 will remain etched in your memory?
Too many. Numerous random moments with Anna, where I watch her being Her, everything stops, and I remember what a miracle she is and just how lucky I am to be her mommy. October 19th: Saying good-bye to Anna at the airport on my way to NYC and spotting my husband, with a little "floop" in my stomach, upon arrival. Saying goodbye to my grandma before she died. October 9th: The sea of people watching the sun rise at Michigan stadium as we waited to start the 10K. Moving day, and the day we put up the For Sale sign at our old house. The view of the sunrise from our home. Bono in person. Anna in a white flower girl dress walking bravely down the aisle with Blake. Our Chicago reunion, for many reasons. Countless photographs from our Palm Beach vacation.

What were your biggest achievements of the year?
Achieving more harmony in my life (still a work in progress though), my 10k time. It feels like being a parent deserves mention...for nearly every parent.

What was your biggest failure?
Oh, it's too easy to think of these. I can think of numerous parenting "failures," which I suppose I could look at as opportunities for learning. Losing my patience way too often, raising my voice, especially. The other big one that comes to mind is continuing to be too self-critical, too pefectionistic.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
No major injuries or illnesses...a disturbing set of symptoms that revealed some autoimmune issues counts I suppose.

What was the best thing you bought?
It's always hard for me to pick one thing. I'm thinking the vinyl records for Blake are high on my list after our post-dinner dance party. My bright orange-y red Joe's skinny jeans. Our family vacation is always precious. Our house, of course, and the armless chairs for our family room. Dinner at Daniel with Blake. Gifts for others.

Where did most of your money go?
The house, hands down.

What did you get really excited about?
Taking Anna on new adventures and witnessing her experience things for the first time like going down a water slide, riding her big bike, having TV dinners together. Our girl's reunion and the NYC trip. I'd be lying if I didn't say Breaking Dawn (and spending more time with Betsy). Acting class. U2 concert. Vodka gimlets. Star sightings in NYC. Christmas. The angel tree gift buying with Anna.

What song will always remind you of 2011?
This is easy...Rio. I have no idea how many times we've listened to the Rio soundtrack this year. Is that sad?

What do you wish you'd done more of?
Meditate. Date nights with Blake. Been more present with Anna.

What do you wish you'd done less of?
Always...worrying.

What was your favorite TV program?
We don't watch a lot of TV...probably Chopped is our most frequently viewed show. I also got sucked into the Bachelor (embarrassing, but true). I really WANT to get into Mad Men.

What were your favorite books of the year?
I just finished The Hunger Games trilogy, which I found surprisingly addictive. I re-read The Outsiders after many, many years and still enjoyed it, even if it was more depressing than I remember. Freedom was probably the most impressive book club book.

What was your greatest musical discovery?
While I love music, I'm so "out of it" when it comes to new stuff. I actually would love to hear other's discoveries so I can add them as a Pandora station. That's what I find myself listening to most of the time. Today it was Abba radio...definitely not new.

What were your favorite films of the year?
I liked Crazy, Stupid, Love. Breaking Dawn (I'm a sucker for a love story, even if it involves vampires and werewolves). I didn't see many other movies in the theater, though. I have a long list that I really want to see before awards season starts.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
It changed drastically after Anna was born...from business clothes and dry clean only "going out" attire to comfortable, easy-to-wash shirts, jeans and leggings. This year I did buy more dresses for nights out. I don't think my lifestyle actually matches my "personal fashion concept." I don't buy a lot of clothes that I'd really like to, because I just don't need them.

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 35!! Blake and I took turns having nights out with friends, we celebrated at home with Anna.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not sure...probably, again, worrying less or being more present.

What kept you sane?
Running, time with girlfriends, reading, Blake's support, sewing, enough sleep, my mom.

Tell us a valuable lesson you learned in 2011.
There are many, but I really, truly surprised myself with my 10K time, which happened because I set goals and committed to a training program. I learned that, by virtue of having the goal of a race to work toward, I easily carved out time for myself to run. Before training and after the race, without the goal, this time seemed to disappear. You really can do just about anything you set your mind and heart to.

Four Christmases, Part 4

2012-01-04T08:49:00.000-08:00

Last but definitely not least came Christmas at the river. We celebrated over New Year's weekend, not that we needed another excuse to party and have a good time. It was a full house with eight adults and four little girls running around, and it was full of good food and good times. We played dominoes and Balderdash, watched Nemo, Lisa and I ran, we ate and ate and ate some more, we talked and laughed, exchanged presents, and relaxed together (as much as four young girls would let us).

Here are my favorite pics from the weekend. If you want to see the "official" family photos as well, visit Lisa's blog.

Papa and his girls.

Ellie looking so grown up.

Allison playing with her new kitchen toys.

A new Rio shirt from Mo and Papa.

Josie opening her new guitar...seen in many pictures to come.

Blake tuning the girls' guitars.

Anna received hand-crafted bunk beds for her new twin babies

Uncle Kyle and Josie learning together.

Anna and Ellie playing with the horses.

More guitar time.

Outside time

Four Christmases, Part 3

2012-01-03T07:49:00.000-08:00

The day after Christmas took us to Mo and Papa D's. We opened presents not long after we arrived, then we just enjoyed the remainder of our day playing and relaxing. We also celebrated Christmas with the extended family, including Seth who came home from L.A. and Grammie Jan who stopped in with goodies for everyone. Before the feast (where Mo D outdid herself, as usual) and annual auction, we all gathered at the cemetery to bury Grandma Lower. While her presence was missed, we all received a flashlight in her honor to carry on the tradition!

Opening her bitty twins, named Gill 1 and Gill 2 (thanks for the help naming, Papa D)!

The awesome blue rain hat Mo D sewed for Anna.

Daddy and Anna made a great snowman with very little snow to work with.

Always making us laugh, that Grammie Jan.

I love this guy.

The gigantic flying fish Blake brought for his auction gift.

Anna and Grace loved their muppets. I love the Grace and Miss Piggy have matching hair.

Winding down with Mo D and the puppets.

Four Christmases, Part 2

2012-01-02T08:13:00.000-08:00

Anna was beyond excited this Christmas. She even woke in the middle of the night for well over an hour in anticipation. Even so, at 6 am she was happy and smiling and ready to see the packages under our tree. The gift giving and receiving was fun for us all, but the best part of our day was just being at home with each other, no place to go and nothing to do except play with each other and with our toys. We hungrily devoured a late morning pancake breakfast and lunched on sweet and spicy popcorn. Since our dishwasher was on the blink, we skipped preparing an elaborate meal and instead, enjoyed more play time before eating leftover beef bourguignon. The only thing missing was snow, but we still ventured outside for a little fresh air and a family gallop down the street just before dinner. I even squeezed in a short run. We were filled with gratitude for our good fortune and our family.

I rarely capture a smile THIS big on camera. The infamous blow up blue dog that made all other gifts almost irrelevant.

Blake modeling the new bandana Anna and I sewed for him.

1986 Lite Brite - I think Blake and I will be playing with this one a lot.

We need to invest in reusable wrapping paper.

Enjoying a few quiet moments with her new pet fish, named Gill.

Four Christmases, Part 1

2012-01-01T17:13:00.000-08:00

We arrived home on this first day of 2012 after almost a week away. It feels like Christmas Eve was just yesterday; the 24th began a week with days so full of goodness - food, family, presents, and memory-making - that it's all a blur. I have four Christmases to blog about before I can even think about a post reflecting on our year and planning for the next. So, here goes...

We celebrated Christmas with Blake's family at our house on Christmas Eve morning. Our first time hosting for the holidays in our new home and our dishwasher broke down first thing in the morning, but we were blessed with many hands to help. Blake prepared the majority of our feast, consisting of bacon-wrapped dates, a gratin a la Julia Child and a sweet onion frittata, roasted shrimp cocktail, an antipasti platter, a simple green salad, fresh fruit, and mimosas. There were, of course, gifts and games and good times shared.

Anna was very excited about penguin number one (this was the Christmas for penguins ).

Opening her purler beads...a favorite this Christmas.

A new GPS!

Thanking Uncle Blair and Aunt Carolyn for the giant stuffed jellyfish.

Papa's new golf bag.

A new golf hat (there was a golf theme for Blake this Christmas).

On Christmas Eve

2011-12-24T19:26:00.000-08:00

Anna and I played with her new perler beads while Blake made our Christmas Eve dinner.

While Anna and I decorated gifts with sparkly blue bows and red, shiny ribbons, Blake was up to something on the computer. I wasn't supposed to look...

We took our traditional Christmas Eve drive to look at lights before we enjoyed this magnificent beef bourguignon by candlelight.

We, of course, put out cookies and milk for Santa and a carrot for the reindeer (I guess the reindeer each just get one bite).

Anna carefully hung our stockings on the mantel before we snuggled up to read Twas the Night Before Christmas by the fire.

Then we got to work. And, Santa came. He brought one really big surprise this year - a fish for Anna. I think, besides the fish, the vintage 1986 Lite Brite that's waiting to be unwrapped might be my favorite. I can't wait to find out what Anna's favorites are.

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

Holiday Warm Up

2011-12-21T16:26:00.000-08:00

Uncle Chris, Aunt Amy, and Allison are home for the holidays, and they made an overnight stop at our place last night on their whirlwind tour through southeast Michigan. It was so nice to have them here - we didn't do much, which was perfectly fun for all of us I think. The kids played inside and out and then crashed early, leaving the grown-ups plenty of time to catch up. We spent hours upon hours talking, the midnight hour creeping up on all of us. I lost count of the Manhattan tally between Chris and Blake at three, and I finally heard him creep into bed at 2:30am.

Sadly, Blake had to drag himself to work this morning, but the rest of us lazed around, doing very little except attempting to make graham cracker gingerbread houses (because the store was sold out of the real thing yesterday). It was so very nice to spend some quiet time with my brother, sister-in-law, and my niece.

Allison. Cute or what?

Chris was ill-prepared for the cold, but Allison's gloves made nice ear muffs.

Engrossed in Super Why!

That's a look that says I've had way too many gummi bears and jelly beans.

Also many, many gummi bears and jelly beans.

My Best Mommy

2011-12-20T05:01:00.000-08:00

This morning when Anna snuggled up in bed with us at 6:15am, she grabbed onto my arms that were wrapped around her little body, squeezed and exclaimed, "You're my best mommy!"

"You're my best Anna," I replied.

What a perfect way to wake up in the morning.

It Doesn't Get Much Better

2011-12-19T18:46:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was the kind of day that feels just about perfect. Only snow could have made it better. Maybe I cherished Sunday so much because I knew it was the last day of this year where our little family had nothing we absolutely had to do. We relaxed and just enjoyed our time together.

So, Blake let me sleep late while he and Anna ate breakfast. When I came down, Anna and I colored for, what seemed like, hours. I'd make the outline of Christmas trees and candy canes and she'd decorate them elaborately with colorful bulbs and stripes. In the midst of coloring, Blake and I finally put up some more pictures around the house. We stayed in our pajamas until nearly lunch time. I leisurely folded laundry with Anna's help - she "wrapped gifts" with all the cloth napkins she folded. With a pork shoulder slowly cooking in the crock pot, Anna napped, and Blake and I both exercised.

When Anna woke, we drove to Hudson Mills Metro Park, just a few miles from our house, and we discovered a remarkable new play structure that will be our new "farther park" this summer. I can't believe we didn't find it right after we moved in. The sun was setting by the time we drove home, so we took the opportunity to check out Christmas lights, again. We'd designated it "family movie night," and we watched The Polar Express while we dined on pulled pork served on TV trays. I snuck away to make hot chocolate for dessert, which Anna discarded after finishing her marshmallows. Blake and I read ourselves to sleep before eleven o'clock. It doesn't get much better.

You can't see her eyes, but the smile (in every photo) says it all.

The Nutcracker

2011-12-17T16:36:00.000-08:00

I had to find a stranger at intermission to get a photo of us today. I'm not sure why Anna looks so sullen - she had such a wonderful time!

Blake, Anna, and I enjoyed our first Nutcracker experience this afternoon. The ballet was presented by the Ann Arbor Ballet Theatre, and since it was my first trip to the ballet, I don't have anything to compare it to. I'm guessing it differed a bit from a performance in Chicago or NYC, but it was still beautiful, and we had so much fun.

When I arrived home in the morning, Anna was already asking to get her tights on - she has a HUGE thing for tights right now. I think she'd wear them everyday if I did the laundry often enough. She also wanted me to blow dry her hair, and I couldn't help letting her wear the smallest amount of blush and a dusting of imperceptible eye shadow. She was just so excited, and so was I.

We shared a pasta lunch downtown and hurried to the theater to find our seats - three rows from the front (I'd forgotten that I'd selected seats THAT close to the stage). We could see everything, down to the snowflakes that landed on the snow faeries eyelashes in the Land of Snow. We had one potty break at the end of the first Act, but otherwise, Anna was engrossed nearly the entire time. She snuggled up on my lap, whispered "I love you" so many times, especially after we treated her to some gummy bears during the intermission, and she insisted, as we walked out the door to go home, that we do it again soon.

I think it will be a Christmas tradition from now on.

What Did I Do Before the Holidays?

2011-12-15T17:32:00.000-08:00

I think I actually slept, watched a TV show or two, played with Anna more, talked to Blake, exercised, took pictures, and e-mailed, among other things.

This week, I've done the following, much of which is holiday-related:

Skipped my chiropractor appointment to clean out closets and storage
Took donations to the Salvation Army
Delivered angel tree gifts
Battled (am still battling) a cold
Shopped, twice in stores, and a lot online
Taught spinning (at least one day of exercise)
Had a quiet dinner out with Blake (my mom hung with Anna so shopping and dinner out could make the list)
Stayed up too late reading The Hunger Games
Attended book club
Wrapped presents with Anna while watching The Polar Express, amazed at how clearly Anna signed her name on everyone's gifts
Baked cookies with Anna, Mo J, and Aunt Carolyn
Sewed gifts, with more to do here, too
Packaged cookies and gifts with Anna to deliver to neighbors and friends
Took Anna to Jungle Java, played Memory, read stories, did puzzles
Wished and wished and wished for snow
Picked up the house (so our wonderful cleaning lady could come)
Made lots of lists (left to buy for lists, holiday to do lists, grocery lists)
Cooked mediocre meals

I'm sure there's more, but I'm groggy and going to TRY to get to bed early. Tomorrow: treadmill, undivided attention for Anna, and a trip to hang with my friend Betsy overnight. When I return on Saturday, it's off to The Nutcracker...a first for all of us. I'm so, so excited. I'm going to put aside the grocery shopping, cooking, sewing, wrapping, cleaning and packing that have to be done next week and really enjoy this wonderful pre-Christmas holiday weekend.

Note to self: Christmas is a very good time to practice striving for excellence rather than for perfection. Blake insists I'm putting too much pressure on myself to make the holidays "perfect" for everyone (not me)! I had one meltdown this week, a product of trying to do too much, too perfectly I suppose. I need to remember to recharge my batteries with a little downtime, time to reflect and check my head. When that time is scarce, my sanity is momentarily lost.

Tonight's my night I guess.

Oatmeal Cookies and Hot Chocolate

2011-12-12T12:30:00.000-08:00

We've been experimenting a bit more with dairy-free baking during the holidays. Anna and I made hot chocolate last week to enjoy with our oatmeal raisin cookies, and both were unbelievably delicious. Here are the recipes:

Dairy-Free Hot Cocoa (adapted just slightly from this recipe we used last year)

Heat a small saucepan over medium heat. Whisk together 1 Tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder, 1 Tbsp sugar, and 1 Tbsp water in the pan until blended. Add 8 ounces rice milk and mix well. Lower heat and heat until warmed through. Add at least six miniature marshmallows (Anna added this part to the recipe).

Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

Adapted from the Whole Foods Allergy Cookbook

½ cup Coconut Oil

¼ cup molasses

½ cup maple syrup

1 tsp. vanilla extract

3/4 cup all purpose flour

1/2 cup whole wheat flour

¼ tsp. salt

1 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp aluminum-free baking powder

1 cup oats
Raisins (to taste)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Beat shortening/coconut oil with molasses and maple syrup in a large mixing bowl. Add vanilla extract. Combine flour, salt, cinnamon, baking soda, and baking powder. Add to mixing bowl. Add oats, stir and then add raisins (we added a lot for Anna and I, then separated a small batch for Blake without...he doesn't like raisins in his cookies).

Drop by heaping teaspoons onto a lightly greased cookie sheet, and cook 10-12 minutes, until cookies are browning around the edges.

Let cool on cookie sheet before transferring to plate with a spatula.

Makes 1 ½ - 2 dozen cookies

Joyful Moments

2011-12-11T17:46:00.000-08:00

Once again, we filled the weekend with holiday-inspired activities. The next thirteen days will, undoubtedly, follow suit. I feel a bit frantic with so much happening and so much to do, and then little moments of peace and joy hit me, if I stay present and soak it all in.

Papa and Mo Mox came to stay on Friday so Blake and I could attend his company holiday party. Earlier in the day, Mo, Papa, and I traipsed around outside looking for deer tracks, Papa read "The Polar Express," and Anna somehow lured us all into her crawl-through tunnel, which only she can fit into comfortably. The next morning Anna couldn't wait to wake Papa and Mo. She was thrilled to discover that Mo brought her wintery "sticky window things," which they hung while Blake nursed his mild hangover and I nursed the beginnings of a cold. Anna was so sad to see them both go at lunchtime.
She didn't have to wait long for another visitor, though. Anna had a date with Daddy and Uncle Blair on Saturday evening while I ate cookies at Emily's house. Emily hosted a cookie exchange - it was my first, and I would definitely do it again (at least if Emily hosts...she outdid herself once again). The food was festive, the ten dozen different kinds of cookies were all delicious, and the girl-time was, as always, invaluable.

The holidays are, for us, about family, about friends, about celebration and tradition. Spending time with family and friends this weekend brought many joyful, peaceful moments. Christmas, for us, is also about giving. Now that Anna can better understand, we've tried this year to share the origins of Christmas with her and tried to help her understand that not everyone is as fortunate as we are. Today Blake, Anna, and I went Christmas shopping to buy clothes and toys for one little three-year-old girl, an "angel" that we adopted through the Salvation Army's Angel Tree Program. We've done something similar in years past, in some form or other. This year, though, was very special, because Anna was involved in picking the girl and selecting all the items for her. She surprised me by asking for just one thing in the store, some balls she saw before we even began our shopping (which she didn't get, and she did not pout or whine about it). From then on, she was focused on picking out gifts. Her excitement for giving and her generosity inspired me. It was, as always, a wonderful feeling to be able to give in this way. It can sometimes seem like a selfish act - the joy and good-feelings I experience by giving are gifts in and of themselves.

Blake and I are fortunate parents. We know will see Anna's face light up on Christmas morning, and for a parent, that is the best gift. As we walked the aisles searching for toys, the frantic feelings dissolved today when I realized, hopefully, that, in addition to the tangible gifts for our angel, we'll be giving a little something to the parents, too. Joy.

The Swimming Saga

2011-12-07T17:30:00.000-08:00

Until this week, Tuesday was swimming lesson day. In September Anna excitedly jumped into the ninety degree swimming pool at Goldfish Swim School for her first ever swimming lesson. We started off in a class where I swam, too, and after two or three of these, it was clear she belonged in the next level. She did wonderfully in her first "solo" class with her teacher, Miss Alex, and one other little boy. I've lost track now of how many sessions she did where I watched her from the viewing area, she and I smiling proudly. She chatted and giggled with Miss Alex and appeared to be having loads of fun. Until one day she wasn't. It was shortly before our trip to New York, and she had a meltdown about me leaving (even though she'd be able to see me watching her on the other side of the glass). The next week, the meltdown grew. It was the kind of painful thing I feel like I've witnessed only in movies; she was gasping for breath, purple-faced, hanging on to me for dear life.

In the midst of this, we switched to a different class time with three little girls, but with the same instructor. This was a big mistake on my part, but I'd thought the difficulties would come to an end after our trip to New York passed. I thought the new class would be a better fit for her and for our schedule, but it only served to make the parting worse. And, instead of getting over it and having fun, as she'd done when she was with one other kid, she sat sadly in the corner of the pool. She did not participate much and cried when she would get splashed or kicked, which happened a lot with a bigger class and less one-on-one teacher time. She looked lonely.

Over the course of a couple of weeks, Anna verbalized a few reasons that she did not like swimming anymore: she couldn't do what she wanted to do in the water, namely flying; she didn't want to put her face in the water, and they wanted her to; she didn't like it that I was on the other side of the glass; she was uncomfortable when the other kids got close and splashed and kicked her. Blake and I also wondered if, because her gross motor skills are not very strong, she wasn't able to perform the way she wanted to; she is such a perfectionist. We talked through some of these as best as possible, and decided we would go back into our original, smaller, quieter class. This was much better - the separation was tough, but not unbearable, and she had fun again. It seemed that minimizing the sensory input was a good way to go. Then we missed class to travel to Midland, and when swimming came up last week, she absolutely did not want to go. Up until that time, she at least expressed an interest in being there, until we got there. So, after much pain and deliberation on my part, we didn't go last week. We went to a "free swim" on Thursday instead, thinking she may just need to get comfortable again, but she still insisted that she did not want to go back. So, we pulled her out.

You can imagine that each and every time the painful departures happened I was a pillar of strength (can you hear the sarcasm)? I'm sure she was actually better off than I was, despite her discomfort and tears. I was a mess inside on the other side of the glass, feeling sad that she was sad, wondering what was the right thing to do. Having a hard time was OK, but this was supposed to be fun, and she just looked miserable. I did not want her to lose her love of swimming. We never intended this to be more than something she would enjoy, and she obviously was not loving it.

I really struggled with the decision to stop swimming lessons. What kind of message is it sending to her if we pull her out? If we force her to stay in? What's the lasting impact either way? Is there a lasting impact at three? Probably not. I thought of every possibility with either option, as I tend to do; I examined the good and bad of both sides. In the end, Blake and I felt like she stuck it out for a good amount of time...if I did what was comfortable for me and her, I probably would have grabbed her the very first time she was upset and walked out comforting her, but I knew that was not the best thing for her. I just hope that she continues to love swimming in the future, that we didn't steal away this thing that she loves, her thing, from her by continuing on for as long as we did.

A couple of months ago, Anna mentioned wanting to take a dance class. Serendipitously, a Living Social deal came up for a place in our small town, so we bought an eight-week package. We went to watch the class last Friday, and we signed her up starting in January. More learning opportunities for both of us ahead...

The Curly Bearded Santa

2011-12-06T11:45:00.000-08:00

We had brunch at the club on Sunday with Uncle Blair and our friends, Julie, Jeff, and Jackson. The infamous balloon man was there to make Anna a blue penguin, her favorite bird of late. Of course, Santa was there, too and the not-so-famous Christmas bear, whom many children, including Anna feared intensely.

She was thrilled to see Santa, but I don't blame her for not wanting to sit on some strange man's lap. She did want to give him the letter and picture she drew for him, at a distance of course. It was a very exciting day.

After we visited Santa at the club, Anna mentioned to me that it's strange how Santa in the Rudolf cartoon has a straight beard, but the one at the club has a curly beard. While she knows Santa has helpers who dress up to look like him (thanks to The Bird in Santa's Beard), she was still confused by the variations on Santa's looks.

Then Anna saw a very real looking Santa with a genuine white beard on Monday at the mall, where she also kept a safe distance but had a lengthy conversation. Later that evening, she told Mo D that she didn't think the curly beard Santa was real, but the one with the straight beard at the mall...he was the real thing. She's a very observant girl.

Now, if she'd noticed the slight southern twang on the mall Santa, she might think otherwise.

If The Shoe Fits...

2011-12-05T17:57:00.000-08:00

Anna will want to buy it in every color.

I know you're thinking that, because Anna was shopping with Mo D and me, we must have been encouraging her in the shoe department. I assure you, we were not. I tried to steer her away from them, but she REALLY wanted to try on some shoes. I just couldn't deny her that after a long day at the mall. Just look at her smiling face.

She fell for a shiny purple pair and could not be dissuaded to select something more practical. I guess I can't blame her.

O, Christmas Tree

2011-12-04T17:00:00.000-08:00

After a sausage and fruit breakfast yesterday, because I forgot to buy eggs, we packed our cold-weather gear into the car and began our annual Christmas-tree-cutting adventure. First we stopped at Morgan and York to purchase the feast and then to the tree farm to chop down a "double-needle balsam," which is how Blake now refers to our Frasier Fir.

It was a long day waiting to decorate the tree.

Big

M & Y was as lovely as ever; their cappuccino as perfect as Italy's, the cheese, salami, and olives as gorgeous as they are tasty, and the staff amazingly helpful. Tree-cutting this year was more pleasant than in previous years, given the warmer weather. It was, as always, such a hard decision, though! We'd agreed on a bigger tree this year - I was excited to indulge in one since we have high ceilings now. After miles of searching, we settled on one that is a bit pear-shaped and eleven feet tall. Anna was relieved that we could finally go home and decorate the tree. Let the fun begin.

Keeping herself busy while STILL waiting to decorate.

Anna's favorite ornament this year...her new blue macaw.

By the time we made it back to our house, it was close to 2:30pm. We let the tree sit for a little while, and then I started on the lights while we watched The Grinch. I always do the lights, and I don't usually mind. Remind me next year that I DO MIND when it involves eleven feet of Christmas tree and six strands of lights, some right out of the box, that only half work or don't work at all. After two hours of hanging lights, I had one third of the tree done. Anna decorated that part of the tree, we ate meat and chocolate fondue, she decorated a bit more, and after she went to bed, I finished the lights with our neighbor's long light-hanging stick and a very tall ladder. I stopped counting at 9 strands of lights, but I think it was close to 12 or 13. I may have finished around 9pm. Blake and I had some more food and wine, hung some decorations at the top of the tree, and finally called it a night at midnight.

In spite of all that, or maybe because of it, we do love our tree.

The blurry finished product at midnight.

Scattered

2011-12-01T19:42:00.000-08:00

It snowed on Tuesday night, and for the first time ever, Anna and I walked to the end of our driveway, plopped down on a sled, and raced down the hill in our side yard - the one that must have been specifically designed for sledding. It seems that, although we only accumulated about 2 or so inches of snow, the wind factor where we live blows it into just the right places. It was perfectly placed for our sledding adventure. We didn't last long, though; Anna quickly tired of walking up the steep hill, and it's not so easy to carry her anymore.

The sledding out our front door is one of many perks here. The view after a snowfall is even more spectacular. I wish I'd taken more pictures while we were outside yesterday morning, but I have them in my head, and I know we'll have many more snows ahead. The favorite one I didn't take was of Anna standing at the top of the hill, me at the bottom, fresh snow everywhere except for the strip carved by my first solo run on the sled. The bluest blue sky shone behind her with whisps of clouds making a halo around her head. Her smile beamed at the center.

I have been solely focused on Christmas since we returned from Thanksgiving. While I have my rules about not listening to Christmas music before the fourth Thursday in November, once the turkey is carved, I have it on all the time. After Anna goes to bed I've been shopping around online, planning cookies, sewing gifts, and reworking our countdown activity calendar. We've run numerous Christmas-centered errands, we enjoyed the first of our daily Christmas-themed activities today by writing a letter to Santa, and we made some impromptu homemade ornaments yesterday. I've been neglecting my reading and my blogging.

It sounds idyllic. In truth, these are the idyllic moments, scattered amongst the currently challenging ones like parenting a toddler who is going through a little "phase," being a mom who is going through a little "phase," and managing my own expectations of my performance, my career, my marriage, my life. I try to focus on the positive, which is important and good, but that doesn't always paint the most accurate picture of our lives.

Maybe, at least for me, it's the hormones that rear their ugly head each month, maybe it's the fact that the year is ending, and I always get reflective AND forward-thinking (and self-critical). For Anna, I'm guessing it's just what kids do. After instituting some "Love and Logic" techniques a while back, management of her emotions, and mine for that matter, improved. Maybe I've slacked on implementation lately, and with the big changes to our schedule, it seems like she's just a ball of fire. She's more demanding, more needy, more whiny, less affectionate, and it feels like all I'm hearing is "No!" I loathe conflict, and it's just part of daily life with a toddler.

Deliciously happy for a moment...

Of course, "No!" may be all she is hearing from me. And, maybe I'm the one being more demanding, more needy, more whiny. There are so many times that I hear myself saying "No" in some form or another, and I cringe, wondering how I became so Not Fun. I think Stephanie posted a quote a while back about this (I apologize for not knowing the source). The words stuck with me and echo in my head most days - they were along the lines of "Mom is where fun goes to die." To be sure, Blake and I tend to take life too seriously. Too many nights I find myself reflecting on the day and seeing not what I've done right, but how I have inadvertently taught, by example, the very things I don't want to teach or NOT taught the things I've dreamt of teaching. I remember sitting with my journal before Anna was born and even when she was very small, writing down all the life lessons I hoped to teach, grand spiritual principles, metaphysical ideas to impart. Now, at the end of a day, I hope that she knows I love her unconditionally, that I haven't shrunk her spirit with all the "No's," that I'm doing enough to support her in developing into a confident, honest, kind, independent thinker.

So, I look forward to our next snowfall, our next sledding adventure, our cookie-making, our tree-cutting that, even when scattered amongst perpetual whining and repeated defiance, make me (and Blake and Anna) smile and remind me to take life a little less seriously. Dr. Seuss said "...these things are fun, and fun is good." I've been saying this to Anna since she could understand it, but in the end, it's really my lesson to learn. I think she already knows it.

Christmas Lights

2011-11-28T18:30:00.000-08:00

What is it about Christmas lights that makes everything seem better? We were so excited to get our lights up this year that we barely set foot inside the house upon our return from the holiday travel. We worked on them throughout the weekend, and despite periodic foul moods, Anna and I were always cheered by seeing the lights go up (Blake loves them too, but I don't think he enjoys the process quite as much, given that he's always the one on the ladder). Tonight, while driving into town, Anna excitedly pointed out each house with lights, exclaiming every five seconds "Look at that one, Mommy!!" I love that she (and I) can get so excited about something so simple.

Anna took this one. I found it long after she took it and wondered when she managed to sneak away with the camera.

Just a little bit happy. She made me take more than a dozen pictures of her with these deer.

This is a favorite spot of mine at our new place...the corner of the front porch.

Almost done...from Anna's perspective.

We started our indoor decorating this weekend too, with garland on bannisters, the mantel and the sideboard. Candles, snowflakes, reindeer, pinecones, bulbs, and miniature trees are carefully placed and are now just waiting for the Christmas tree to outshine them all. We're going on Saturday to cut down our Frasier Fir, and I hope we can find a really big one this year now that we have tall ceilings to accommodate one. I'm feeling a little regretful that we didn't get our tree this weekend - historically we've waited until the week after Thanksgiving, but I think we need to change that tradition next year. I can't wait until Saturday.

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-11-25T17:17:00.000-08:00

The last 7 days, no, the last two or three weeks, are such a blur. We have had so much going on, emotionally, physically, and on our calendars. A friend of mine joked last week that I need a graph just to sort out what I'm actually reacting to and where my feelings are coming from. While I'm a jumble of big feelings, the good thing about it all is that I haven't had much time to focus on one thing before the next thing comes along and demands my attention. And, the other very good thing is the time of year. Thanksgiving inspired a more intentional gratitude practice this month, which always lightens even the heaviest load.

I have zero photos to share from the last two weeks, but I have a few words to remind myself of all that I have to be thankful for, both big and small, on this holiday:

My daily gratitude practice over the last few weeks seemed to follow three themes: family, health, and friends. The specifics varied, but the importance of these three things shined through.
In the last week, I've spent time with friends, both old and not-so-old and connected with some who I haven't spoken with in ages. I am so grateful for the friendships that have spanned decades and lasted despite time and distance apart. I am also grateful for the more recent friendships that I know will span the decades to come.
I'm grateful for my husband who, among so many other things, supports me in nurturing these friendships, even if it means his second night alone in three days, because I'm going to the same movie (again) with another friend.
I'm grateful for the smiling, most-often sweet, very sensitive girl who has graced our lives with her presence. I'm also grateful for all that she teaches me, especially the lessons I need to learn most (like how to live more in the present).
I'm grateful that Anna can see every single one of her grandparents within a day of each other without too much driving and no flying.
I'm grateful that Blake and I have parents who are there for us, both as parents and as friends.
I'm grateful for my health...that it allows me to run long distances and Spin for an hour and carry Anna and move my body.
I'm grateful that I had the opportunity to say good-bye to my grandma before she passed away.
I'm grateful that I have so many wonderful life experiences to look forward to, that I DON'T know what I'm going to be when I "grow up," that I haven't reached my destination.
I'm grateful that there are so many good, happy things happening for people all around me.
I'm grateful for our good fortune, our ability to live and grow in our new home, to travel and experience new things.
I'm grateful for our warm home filled with luxuries like electricity and plumbing and clean water and the sunrise that we see each morning from our kitchen window.
I'm grateful for books and movies.
I'm grateful for good food, wine, and beer.
I'm grateful for the weeks to come, the excitement and anticipation and magic of the holidays with a child.

With Thanksgiving behind us, we are in full holiday preparation and celebration mode - we have our first event at the club next weekend, where Santa will make an appearance. When we arrived home this afternoon after four days away, we promptly dropped our bags inside and began decorating the exterior of the house with Christmas lights. It's that time of year.

Welcome to the Country

2011-11-19T07:24:00.000-08:00

The following are lessons recently learned about living in the country:

1) Do not leave bird seed in your garage. When the weather gets cold, mice will find it and stash away piles of it in your UGG boots, so that one morning you are completely surprised to find a boot-full of seeds while on your way to swimming lessons.

2) When you realize you have mice in your garage or sleeping in your boots, immediately put mouse traps out. Otherwise, a few weeks later, you will find this in the morning when you go into your daughters room...on her tall dresser where there is absolutely no food for them to eat, and you will be absolutely mortified:

3) Know that if there is a mouse all the way upstairs where there is no food, there must be more, even if you have found no mouse poop anywhere else in your house to date. Just go ahead and put the traps everywhere, because when you finally have an entire morning to deep clean your pantry and lazy susan, you will find a few turds here and there, and even some at the top of the basement stairs.

4) When you place the traps, don't put too much peanut butter on them and be sure to follow the instructions, otherwise, you will just feed the mice and keep them coming back for more. It only took us one night to realize this mistake.

5a) If you are up for four hours in the night with a daughter who has a stomach ache and you hear a trap snap, leave it until the morning unless someone wants to walk outside in their PJ's to get rid of it.

5b) When you realize at 3am that your husband put the dead mouse in the kitchen garbage instead (am I the only one grossed out by this?) AND that he put the dead mouse he found the day before when you were not at home in the same garbage bag, and that said garbage bag is still in the kitchen, yell profanities and be sure he knows that it is NOT OK to keep a dead mouse in the house. Leave children unattended and lie to the child about what you are doing if necessary to take it outside in the event that only one parent is home.

6) Do not let your husband put a garbage bag with two dead mice on the driveway outside of your garage at 3am. When you go outside the next day with your daughter and your sister, you will find a ripped open garbage bag on your driveway, and next to it you will find a dead mouse still in a trap, which you will have to pick up and dispose of. Calmly call your husband and remind him that dead rodents attract all kinds of other animals, and garbage bags with those dead rodents need to be put inside of a scavanger-proof garbage bin.

7) Thank your husband for doing the dirty work. Thank you, Blake...I really don't like mice in my house, dead or alive.

Grandma Lower

2011-11-18T17:24:00.000-08:00

Grandma Lower at her 80th birthday party last year.

As I sat down at the computer tonight having not blogged since Tuesday, I struggled with what to post. My grandma, my mom's mom, passed away last night. And, while I don't feel I can write much about it here, it also didn't feel right to post about anything else.

I am grateful that I was able to get back home on Wednesday to say good-bye and tell her that I love her. She's at peace now, I know. This is how I want to remember her, smiling and happy.

She was always overjoyed to see her grandkids and her great grandkids.

Dairy-Free Chocolate Chip Cookies

2011-11-15T16:48:00.000-08:00

These cookies are, seriously, almost exactly like my mom's, which are my absolute favorite chocolate chip cookies. Blake even gave them a nod, and he's a picky dessert eater. They really only required a minor changes from my mom's recipe, which was originally derived from Better Homes and Gardens well over thirty years ago. Her recipe is no longer in print (the recipe in my edition of the cookbook isn't as good). Enjoy!

Dairy-Free Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 Cup palm oil shortening (we use Spectrum Organic Vegetable Shortening, which has no soy)
1 Cup sugar (we use cane, but granulated is fine)
1/2 Cup packed brown sugar
2 tsp vanilla
2 eggs
1 tsp baking soda
2 Cups all purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp salt
1, 12 oz package DARK chocolate chips (we use 365 Brand 70% cocoa chocolate chips...they have no dairy; however, they do have a small amount of soy lecithin, which often is tolerable for those with soy sensitivities).

*My mom's original recipe called for semi-sweet chocolate chips and Crisco shortening (which is soy-based), rather than butter.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

In a large mixing bowl, cream shortening and sugars with an electric or stand mixer until combined, scraping sides of bowl occasionally. Beat in the eggs and vanilla. In a separate bowl, sift together dry ingredients. Gradually add dry ingredients to wet ingredients, mixing together as much of flour as you can with the mixer. Stir in remaining flour if needed. Add chocolate chips and stir until combined.

Drop dough by rounded teaspoons onto an ungreased baking sheet. Bake in 375 degree oven for 8 to 10 minutes or until edges are JUST lightly browned. (My mom always takes hers out before they look done...they are so much better this way, so be sure to check them at 8 minutes). Transfer cookies to a wire rack to cool. Makes about 4 dozen cookies.

Think the cookies have enough chocolate?

Weekend Visit

2011-11-14T17:59:00.000-08:00

Kyle, Lisa, Ellie, and Josie came to visit us this weekend. The delivery of Willie, the pig, was a good excuse to get together (we now have 1/2 of a pig in our freezer), but we don't really need an excuse for beer (or gimlet) drinking, kite flying by the bonfire, game-playing, eating, and catching up with family. It was so much fun that Anna and I both snuggled up for a two hour nap on Sunday after lunch. We're looking forward to the next time already.

Kyle wowed us with his kite-flying capabilities.

I don't think this picture does justice to just how high Kyle flew this kite.

All the girls took turns flying...and I think they were all pretty excited!

Kyle brought the slot cars out on Sunday morning.

First Snow

2011-11-11T17:51:00.000-08:00

It doesn't take much snow to make our little girl very excited about making snow angels.

Random Anna Tidbits

2011-11-08T16:18:00.000-08:00

Anna ate black kalamata olives with her oatmeal for breakfast last week. This week she had salami with her french toast.

You'll often hear her start a sentence with "The fact is..." or "The question is..." or "The problem is..."

She likes almost anything that is blue, dark blue to be exact.

Anna loves to "shop" in catalogues. It's that time of year, and without any encouragement on my part, she's found the stacks that are arriving already, and she started finding all the blue things inside (balls included).

She has friends that come to visit often, such as blue macaw, jelly bean, penguin, and skeleton. They eat with us, take baths with us, and learn to fly with us.

Anna goes to bed with 5-10 animals on any given night, often carefully arranged for comfort (hers and theirs). By the time morning rolls around, almost all of them have been chucked onto the floor.

Anna has fallen out of her bed twice now, AND there are bed rails on the bed. I'm not sure how one gets all the way to the foot of the bed (in the opposite corner) and falls through the small space that's left between the rail and the footboard. Often I find her smashed up against the rails when I check on her before I go to bed at night.

At lunch last week...
Anna, matter-of-factly: "I spilled water. Crap!"
Me: Chuckle as I watch Anna's knowing smile.

The other night Anna slept with a broom stick in her room. It's a recent flying prop, of course. When she padded down the hall in the morning way too early and stood in our doorway, we still managed a laugh, because the broomstick sticking out from under her tiny silhouette was just too adorable.

Up until recently, Anna had all but dropped her naps. She was going to bed around 7 or 7:30 and sleeping until 7am. Then something shifted - just in time for daylight savings, she started waking at 6am. Three days last week, I found her curled up on her bedroom floor, surrounded by a sea of books and stuffed animals. I do wish she'd do that this week. She woke at 5:30am today.

Anna rarely says "I love you" these days, rather she's graduated to "Love ya," something I didn't really expect until maybe the teenage years. Where'd that come from?

Sightings

2011-11-07T06:37:00.000-08:00

While we've seen deer within minutes of our house, until this week they were never in our own backyard. Yesterday one brave one even approached our hammock on our back patio. I wasn't quick enough to get a photo before he turned around to head back into the field.

Dairy-Free Pancake Recipe

2011-11-06T06:37:00.000-08:00

Daddy makes pancakes almost every weekend. We made just a few changes to transform this Food Network pancake recipe into our own dairy-free version. Here's how we do it:

1/2 cup whole wheat flour
1/2 cup all purpose flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 egg
optional: 1 Tbs grape seed oil
3 Tbsp brown sugar
1 1/2 cups rice milk (a little more or less depending on how thick you like them)
Fresh fruit (blueberries, raspberries, diced peaches)
Coconut oil for cooking

In a mixing bowl, whisk together dry ingredients. In a separate bowl, whisk together all other ingredients (other than fruit). Combine wet and dry ingredients, and let them rest for up to two hours (we rarely let it rest for more than 30 minutes, though...who has that much time to wait in the morning?).

Heat griddle. Melt enough coconut oil to coat the bottom of griddle (we actually cook ours on our iron skillet). Pour ladle-full of pancake mixture onto griddle. Sprinkle fruit onto pancake. Flip pancakes when little bubbles break on the surface.

Daddy topped his with frozen raspberries this morning.

We serve with real maple syrup or homemade strawberry sauce as well as peanut, almond, or sunflower butter for a little added protein.

Sunrise

2011-11-04T18:09:00.000-07:00

The time before dawn at our place this week.

Any thoughts on which one I should use for my new blog header?

Found

2011-11-03T07:13:00.000-07:00

Good things come from deep cleaning and organizing! My mom called yesterday with the amazing news that she unearthed my collection of Strawberry Shortcake dolls from my childhood. Frankly, we were both surprised. For as often as Mo D cleans out, I didn't think anything would be undiscovered in her basement.

I am so happy to have these relics, both for me and for Anna. Anna enjoyed playing with them today and quickly declared her favorite as "the one with the darker skin." She gave me back all the rest that she wasn't so fond of, especially Purple Pie Man. I don't know if I ever had a favorite...did you?

Can you believe they still smell? Wonder what they did back in the eighties to make that stuff stick!?

Pinecones

2011-11-02T06:40:00.000-07:00

My friend Emily and I love making lists. When I wanted to add to my Fall List, I asked her to share some of her fun ideas, because I knew there'd be many.

One of her list items was to take a walk in nature and pick up fallen pine cones to use for decorations at home. Last week Anna and I were outside doing a little work and a little play when she, unprompted, started collecting the pine cones scattered along our driveway. I mentioned taking them inside, and she came up with the brilliant idea to paint them. So we grabbed a bucket and piled them in. We could have filled handfuls of buckets - we have at least 20 pine trees lining our lengthy driveway, and all of them are shedding cones right now.

The next day we took them down to our art space and painted some (although she was quickly distracted by the blue tape and her macaw-making obsession). We placed our unpainted ones in mason jars, and they found themselves on a shelf in our kitchen that was in dire need of decor.

I LOVE these paints from Clementine Art - we've used them more than any other "green" paint. They have been great for nearly all our projects.

Halloween Bird-Style

2011-11-01T06:10:00.000-07:00

I don't think I've emphasized enough how obsessed Anna is with birds, specifically blue macaws like the ones in the movie Rio. For months now, Anna has spent her time flying around the house, flapping her "wings," teaching us or her stuffed animals to fly. She builds blue macaws with her new Legos and her bristly blocks, draws blue macaws in her notebook with markers, and makes blue macaws out of colorful tape. It's not surprising that, months ago, Anna decided she wanted to be a blue macaw for Halloween. We struggled to find a costume at first. Mo D thankfully found a parrot costume at Target that we thought was a close second, but we were disappointed to find that her arm barely fit through one of the holes due to poor stitching. We continued our search and eventually discovered a handmade costume on Etsy, a true blue macaw. This was The One.

We ordered her costume on September 20th. It was supposed to be in our hands in three weeks, in plenty of time for trick or treating at Blake's office and for Halloween. The costume arrived just after noon today. I wasn't sweating, not at all. It would take too long to tell the entire story, and I don't need to write it here to remember it 20 years from now. Needless to say, it was a nerve-wracking wait.

I still cannot believe how patient Anna has been through it all, though. After waiting three weeks and expecting it to arrive "any day now," she waited another three weeks. Every day she asked about it, hopeful that it would arrive. There were multiple days we thought the costume was here (because the seller indicated that she'd shipped it out already), only to discover something else in the brown box on the front porch. I think she coped by looking at the picture of her costume online EVERYDAY. When it finally came today, she actually wanted to hide when I opened it. She told me she was just too excited to watch. Fortunately, it was everything she'd hoped for.

Anna doesn't often like to pose for pics, but she wanted her picture taken over and over again today.

For Anna, the costume is very exciting, but this year, the candy was pretty exciting, too. The preparations and anticipation are always part of the fun and have been going on for weeks. We painted pumpkins with Mo D, carved a blue macaw into a pumpkin, trick-or-treated at Blake's office, and practiced our candy-eating.

Thank goodness for Blake's pumpkin carving skills. This was tough!

It's a very good thing we had a back-up costume for trick-or-treating at Blake's work.

Any craft project ends in making blue macaws.

We walked our small neighborhood with our next door friends, Sophia and Rocco. Paul and Blake hung out by the fire Paul built in the front yard, enjoying their beers and handing out candy while Melissa and I walked the kids around to the few houses with lights on, many of which just left the candy on the front porch. It was plenty for Anna this year, although it was vastly different from my trick-or-treating days. I'm guessing she'll be venturing to more populated neighborhoods when she's older (which is what the families did who left their candy on the front porch).

The blue macaw, Snow White, and a very cute tiger.

In flight.

Roar!

We were surprised Anna made it through, after waking at 6:15am and not napping. She was a mildly grumpy-seeming, bashful-feeling blue macaw while gathering sweets - she refused to say trick-or-treat or thank you; however, she would say "tweet tweet" occasionally. I think the best part for everyone was the candy-eating around the bonfire in the dark. We let Anna, just for this special occasion, have as much sweet stuff as she could stand (with the hope that she learns on her own how too much doesn't feel good), so she was in heaven. And when it came to handing out candy to the last few dressed up kids in the neighborhood, she was generous and chatty. It can't get much better than staying up way past bedtime, eating way too much candy, and hanging with friends through it all.

Candy by the bonfire.

Make New Friends...

2011-10-31T07:56:00.000-07:00

But keep the old, one is silver and the other's gold. I learned this song in Brownies when I was in grade school. The words and the melody have stuck with me for a long time, and they came to mind today.

My old (meaning long-time) friend, Alex, her husband Jon, and their kids Emerson and Kincaid came to visit after hitting the U of M game this weekend. It's been almost two years since we've seen each other, but it feels just like it did years ago. The kids played, the grown-ups talked, we ate, and we drank a bit (some more than others). After the kids went to bed, we gathered around the table for Ragu and Guiness Ice Cream, both thoughtfully prepared by Blake. Blake actually adapted a recipe from Ad Hoc at Home to make the ice cream for Alex, knowing it is one of her favorite treats to eat in Ann Arbor (if anyone wants the recipe, he told me he'd be happy to post it). We were so thankful to reconnect with them on Saturday night. It is always just plain fun.

On a slightly different note, Blake also slow roasted a pork shoulder tonight on our recently-acquired-via-a-gracious-hand-me-down Weber grill. I'm so grateful for my weekend chef!

Anna, still in her PJ's, and Emerson, playing blocks.

A very stylish Kincaid.

This girl looks like her mommy!

Frosty

2011-10-30T17:51:00.000-07:00

I can't remember if I've mentioned that we've been singing winter or Christmas songs at bed time all summer long. Even when it was 90 degrees and light poured into Anna's room at 9pm, she wanted us to sing Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer or Frosty the Snowman. After this week's heavy frosts, it doesn't feel quite so absurd.

We watched a brilliant orange and pink sun rise over the horizon of our backyard this morning. I was too mesmerized to grab my camera. The white frost took on a brilliant gold sparkle as the sun rose higher in the sky, melting the crystals. I eventually ran out to snap a few photos before it all melted away.

What I love about this one: the streaks of gold sprinkled among the frosty white.

Our Dirty Laundry

2011-10-27T16:42:00.000-07:00

Does anyone else find these photos both hysterical and maddening?

Blake's dirty t-shirt and boxers. I found them here this morning. Notice the proximity to the dirty clothes laundry basket. Maybe he just missed?

Anna's left sleeve, or in other words, her napkin, speckled with balsamic, chocolate, and pesto.

Anna's right sleeve, or her napkin. To her credit, I don't always provide napkins at every meal (it makes for so much more laundry or paper waste). Even when I do, though, the sleeve is the easiest way to wipe.

NYC for Foodies

2011-10-26T18:04:00.000-07:00

View of the city from Central Park

Is it wrong to go to New York and do nothing but eat, drink, people watch, shop, and walk? We had intentions of getting to a museum and entertained seeing a show for a while, but realistically, we couldn't fit it in with our culinary-focused itinerary. The two full days we had were spent walking, wandering, and exploring New York, including Soho, West Village, Union Square (where we stayed), the financial district, Central Park, and more, mostly with restaurants or bars as our ultimate destination. We had three nights of absolute ecstasy in the food and drink department. Here's the itinerary.

Where we ate and drank:

Balthazar: delicious cocktails (rum for me and bourbon for Blake if I remember correctly) and a cheese plate to share shortly after our arrival.
Flatiron Lounge: Pre-dinner Beijing Peach cocktails at this dark, cozy bar (my friend, Taryn's, favorite...she recommended many of the places we enjoyed, and we are so grateful!)
Gramercy Tavern: Champagne for me, beer for Blake while we waited for our seat at the bar. It's the place to be even when eating dinner. White wines to accompany sweetbreads (yes, we tried them AND loved them), country pate, curried seafood chowder, and mushroom lasagna. Oh, and a glass of sherry for good measure. Amazing people-watching and amusing conversations with other people-watchers.
Gramercy Park Hotel: Gimlets post dinner...barely consumed. We waited to get into the Rose Bar, and decided we'd had enough for the night. We just couldn't do it anymore.
Friend of a Farmer: Omlettes, home fries, coffee, hot cider for our first breakfast. Nursing a bit of a hangover and planning the day ahead.
Da Silvano: Bottle of Prosecco, the best kale, apple, and beet salad I've ever tasted, pasta with tomato cream sauce, unparalleled people watching (someone who I know is famous, but I cannot figure out who it was), and an almost comprehensible, completely wonderful conversation with Silvano himself. A perfect place to rest our feet after walking all morning.
The Four Seasons Hotel Bar: We met Blake's broker here for a martini pre-dinner. A surprisingly delicious ginger infused cocktail for me, and a Manhattan for Blake that was better than any I've had (sorry Dad!)
Daniel: This deserves a paragraph or a post, rather, of its own. If I were a food writer, I might be able to do justice to the artistic creations of chef Daniel Boulud. This was, quite literally, a once in a lifetime experience at one of the top restaurants in the country (see photo of cocktails below). Even the descriptions of our courses were works of art. Blake's favorite dish...Dodge cove oysters in sea water gelee, lemon custard, northern lights caviar, avocado mousse, sea urchin. After cocktails, champagne, wine, and over 10 courses of food, we wanted for nothing more.
Grand Central Market: A stop for focaccia and coffee (and water for me) while walking off dinner.
PJ Clarks: Pub food (ish). We were surprisingly hungry and needed a casual stop on the way to Central Park. Burgers were recommended, but we had potato chips with buttermilk blue cheese dip, tuna tartare tacos, corned beef reubens, and black and tan beers.
Gemma at The Bowery Hotel: We almost missed this jewel. After an early evening nap, we could not make our intended dinner reservation (The Atlantic Grill), so we headed to the bar at Gemma. Beer, wine, grappa to finish, a slice of crispy pizza shared by a new friend at the bar, micro greens salads, and more unbelievable fresh pasta. This was a beautiful last meal in NYC.

Our first incredible cocktail (my iPhone took a few pictures at restaurants...it was at least a bit more discreet than my D80).

Despite the thousands of restaurant choices in NYC, I would go back here next time without a doubt.

A dark photo taken by the other people watchers we friended at the bar of Gramercy Tavern.

Fall windows watching us at breakfast.

A visitor I knew Anna would want to see.

I took a lot of photos of buildings and architecture.

Beautiful old church nestled among skyscrapers.

I love these windows, the reflection, the colors.

The one and only dressing room I went into at Joe's Jeans...beautiful.

My favorite purchase...a pair of bright red-orange jeans.

The unbelievable kale, apple, beet salad at Da Silvano. Seriously, we were so surprised by the texture and flavor.

More beautiful buildings...love the fire escapes!

World Trade Center site. We did not have tickets to get into the memorial. Amazing still.

Wall St., obviously. Beneath this sign were cops on horseback protecting exiting workers from protestors.

Reflection in the subway stairwell.

More subway

And, more subway

The cocktails at Daniel...Blake's had an ice "balloon" filled with his drink, mine held an ice globe with a frozen orchid inside.

Grand Central Market

The rose window, or mandala, on this church is almost identical to my tattoo (which is actually the rose window from a church in Milan, Italy).

Music in the tunnel in Central Park.

He could be in an add for Bloomingdales, no?

After dinner at The Bowery Hotel, we found people waiting outside the bar next door. Paul McCartney was holding a post-wedding party. This is (sadly) the back of Billy Joel's head.

Sean Lennon. Although we didn't stay to see Paul McCartney, we did see Julian Lennon, Yoko Ono, James Taylor, Martin Scorcese, and...

Bon Jovi

Home

2011-10-23T16:34:00.000-07:00

I'm itching to edit photos and post about our wonderful trip, although more of me is itching to sleep at this very moment. I'd hoped our little getaway would be restful as well as fun-filled, and in some ways it was rejuvenating. We did not, however, get that much sleep - there was just too much fun to be had. We also walked more than I think we realized at the time, and our bodies are feeling it (my run today was anything but easy). Our aging bodies are probably feeling the effects of way too much rich food and alcohol, too. What made me think I could mix vodka, champagne, wine, and more vodka, go to sleep at 1:30am, then walk multiple miles around the city the next day, and do it all again that night? To top all that off, Anna isn't being so gentle on us now that we're home. While she managed extremely well at Mo and Papa D's and was way sweet and smiley during her stay, she's rather sour and whiny and challenging now. Despite her mood, it was so good to see our little girl yesterday afternoon. Coming back to reality from a vacation isn't nearly as hard when you're returning to someone you've been missing!

Photos and details coming soon...

Smart Girls Wear Flats

2011-10-19T13:30:00.000-07:00

I’m writing this on the airplane, having FINALLY reached altitude after sitting on the ground for over an hour following boarding. I’m on my way to New York, which still feels a bit surreal, even after having packed a bag and boarded a plane.

While I’ve mostly been feeling a lot excitement and a little nervousness leading up to this pivotal vacation, yesterday, the day before my departure, something temporarily shifted. I didn’t realize it until the tears came (all day) and with little prompting, just how overwhelmed with opposing emotions I was. I guess they are just different sides of the same coin: nervousness and excitement, worry and hopefulness, guilt and certainty that you are doing a very good thing, missing someone fiercely and freedom from responsibility. The bitter and the sweet of it all struck me as I folded Anna’s striped tights into her suitcase to go to Mo D’s on her own for the first time and then folded my textured black tights into my bag, the ones that go with my new bright pink skirt, one of a few carefully planned outfits for much anticipated nights out with my husband.

I’m sure it didn’t help that neither Anna nor I have been sleeping well since Blake left on Saturday. Last night was no exception. It seemed Anna was feeling the same mix of emotions. Nevertheless, we left the house on time this morning and with almost everything we intended, except maybe my brain. I managed to hold back the tears during our good-bye, but even so, Anna heard the crack in my voice, the one she hears even when I think I’m disguising it, and she offered me the consoling snuggle as I kissed her lips and crept out of the back seat.

I walked into the airport feeling a bit lighter, hoping the hard part was behind me. Maybe. After three failed attempts at finding my flight reservation and a near heart attack on my part, a helpful woman (who of course heard how this is the first trip my husband and I are taking without our daughter) finally discovered me in the system. I took my time through security, feeling relieved, and walked toward my gate (the farthest possible one from security), stopping for an everything bagel sandwich, a bottle of water, and essential travel reading material (People and Vogue). It was when I bent down to put the magazines in my carry on that absolute panic set in. I left my laptop at the security screening. When the woman patted me down, she piled two of my other trays on top of my laptop tray, and somehow (somehow?!) I forgot that it was under there. I seriously could not believe I did it. It was so unlike me. That’s when I ran, and I ran fast. I was so thankful to be wearing flats. And to be a runner. At that point, with a half hour until my plane’s departure, I ran the (maybe?) mile back to security, my purse and carry on in tow, sweat dripping down my back, blood sneaking out from a blister on my heal. They, of course, had my laptop, and a nice woman at the counter by my gate held the plane for me, so I knew as I ran the breathless mile back that I wouldn’t miss my flight.

Not even the hour sitting on the ground in a hot, crowded, stinky plane with a screaming child behind me could ruffle my feathers. I’d made it.

Family Time

2011-10-16T20:42:00.000-07:00

If there was a theme for the last week of our lives, it would have to be family time. Since Monday, there've been only two days we haven't seen someone in our extended family. Monday we met Mo D in Birch Run, Wednesday Papa J and Great Mo visited, Thursday Papa Mox came down, Friday Aunt Kaity babysat while I got my hair cut, and today we went to the apple orchard with Aunt Carolyn. Here's the last week in a few pictures:

The one afternoon with nothing planned. Anna and I did craft projects, made cookie dough, and played outside.

Anna went horseback riding on a really big horse named Arc. Papa came along, too, to watch this brave girl try something new.

We discovered a new favorite place to visit that houses rescued macaws (Anna's favorite bird).

Just Mom, Dad, and Anna on Saturday afternoon picking pumpkins.

Our third trip to the corn maze/farm by our house this year. The second trip was for a pony ride.

There was a fire close by that made this pic look smoky, but I kinda like it.

Have you noticed the lack of smiles on Anna's face? She's been a bit somber at times since Saturday when Daddy was gearing up to leave. Taken on the hay ride at the apple orchard.

More scowls. She wasn't in the mood for pictures.

Aunt Carolyn and pumpkins finally made her smile.

Food...And a Recipe

2011-10-13T08:55:00.000-07:00

It's been way too long since I've posted a recipe or anything about food, for that matter. It's such a huge part of our lives, every single day. It's huge in different ways now, though, than it was when Blake and I were alone and even when Anna was younger and just starting to try new things.

For a while now, our lunches have been much like our breakfasts - we have three or four options, and we alternate between those almost every day of the week, with different fruits or veggies on the side. Of course, leftovers are often on the menu if we've had soup or pasta or anything that's better the second day. But, it used to be that I'd make new things for lunch - quinoa salad, pasta salad, quesadillas with freshly sauteed veggies. We must not have been involved in so many fun things back then. I can't see fitting that in now.

This summer, Anna and I were outside so much or at the pool so late in the afternoon, that cooking dinner was the last thing on my mind. We weren't trying out new recipes from our latest issue of Food and Wine, rather, we were having a beer with the new neighbors and wondering how we can rework the ingredients of a more elaborate meal to whip up something in just 15 minutes instead. But, a few weeks ago, the itch came back. I remember the day - one of the first cool days. Anna and I were home in the afternoon. I had TIME to cook something. We were getting squash from our CSA. I wanted soup. I wanted every kind of soup I hadn't had in 6 months. So began another season of cooking...

We've been eating a lot of soup. Soups with squash, soups with kale and white beans, soups with sausage. I have yet to find a favorite squash soup. It seems I make a different one every time, and I like them all, none enough to commit to one. We've also been back to baking. I found a delicious autumn apple muffin recipe that is dairy and gluten-free, included below, as well as a dairy-free pumpkin pancake recipe (that one still needs some work). The crock pot is out again for roasts, beans, pulled pork, and chili. Chana masala and fish curry bring warmth to cooler nights.

All this being said, I'm really looking forward to NOT cooking for a few days while we're in NYC. Along with all the cooking comes a lot of mess and a lot of clean up. I'm also excited to try some new foods, get a little inspiration. I'm feeling stuck in a rut, repeating the same old recipes. One challenge with exploring new options is how to tweak them to be dairy-free. While it really is a way of life for us now, one that is not usually difficult to maintain at home, the new beer and cheddar soup that caught my eye just wouldn't be right without the cheddar, now would it.

Spiced Apple Muffins (from The Nourishing Gourmet)

Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Put paper muffin cups in a muffin tin (this recipe makes about 10 muffins).

1/2 cup coconut flour
3/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp fine sea salt
1 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1/4 tsp ground cloves

1/3 cup coconut oil
1/4 cup honey
3 eggs
1 cup shredded apples (wash and core the apples, shred peel as well)

In medium bowl, combine dry ingredients and briskly whisk until all lumps are removed.

Melt oil and honey together on the stovetop (until just melted, don't get it too hot, or it will cook the eggs). Add these to the dry ingredients. Whisk together eggs. Add those to the mix and whisk until well combined. Add the apples and mix together.

Divide between muffin cups and bake for 25 minutes or until tops are golden and toothpick stuck in middle comes out clean.

Some Things Speak to You

2011-10-12T16:43:00.000-07:00

Even though I'd seen and loved Kelly Rae Roberts artwork on my sister-in-law's wall this summer, it wasn't until I came across it again in a store that it really spoke to me. We were wandering and browsing in stores while visiting Ludington, and there were multiple pieces for sale that I clung to, wishing to take home with me. I didn't take anything home that day. We were in a hurry, and I just couldn't decide which one to buy. As soon as we were back to the hotel, I visited her website...and browsed, and read, and browsed some more. I still couldn't decide.

Her work, and her story, especially her birth story, are truly inspiring to me. Even beyond that, it's like her art reflects just what I need to hear, what I'm trying to remind myself, or how I'm trying (even if not succeeding) to live. Oh, and we share the same first and middle name (How many Kelly/Kellie Rae's are there out in the world? I actually know of two others besides me now).

A few weeks ago, I returned to her website, knowing with more certainty what I was looking for. This time, I had no trouble picking the perfect two pieces for our house, one for my space and one for Anna's. Now that I have them, I can't imagine any others being more perfect.

It reads: Tell your story, believe in healing, honor your intuition, take the journey back to your self, wear more skirts, begin today.

Taking Flight

8:46

2011-10-09T14:57:00.000-07:00

I ran in my first 10k this morning, The Big House Big Heart race, which finishes in the U of M football stadium. Saying I surprised myself is a gross understatement; I finished with a pace of eight minutes, forty-six seconds per mile!! This deserves multiple exclamation points - I'm over the moon. I finished 36th out of 167 people in my age group, 927th out of 2299 in the 10k overall. I can't say it was easy. I pushed myself to keep this pace, throat and sinuses burning, but it still felt remarkable.

Waiting to start

I heard someone say there were close to 15,000 people running today. As I stood at the start with the sun rising in the distance, my dad and Blake were texting me words of encouragement while thousands of people listened to the national anthem - it brought tears to my eyes (what's new?). Then the race started, and the energy was contagious. The live music, the cheering spectators, and the other runners really kept me going, even up the hills. I checked my pace periodically, but when I reached the 4.25 mile mark and I was still averaging a 9-minute-mile, I thought, "I can't slow down now!" Running through the tunnel into the stadium with the UM fight song playing, my legs shaking, and my heart pounding from the adrenaline, I was so hoping Blake and Anna made it in time...I told them to expect a 10-minute-mile (although at the start, I did line up with the 9-minute-mile folks. I figured I'd set the intention!)

They just made it. And, as you can see, I was so happy to see them standing at the finish. I can't wait to do it again!

This was the scene after the 10k...not nearly the mob that showed after the 5k.

The best part for Anna...seeing the chicken (and the penguin, the bear, the firefly...)

Check out the mob behind Blake and Anna now...this is while the 5k runners were finishing.

Newness

2011-10-08T17:32:00.000-07:00

Even though Autumn signals the return of darkness, longer days and shorter nights, and hibernation or dormancy, it also seems to me like a time for new things. Spring may be considered the season of rebirth and growth, but everything around me looked new and different during my run this week. Life was everywhere - the vibrant colors of changing leaves, the deer staring back at me from just feet away, the bats swooping over my head (not my favorite part of running at dusk), the insanely colorful sunsets that grace our front porch - it didn't seem quite so bleak as the coming of winter sometimes can. Even our house has been invaded with life. We have Japanese Lady Beetles multiplying in our windows, wasps and bees and praying mantis' popping up outside, and baby spiders swinging from silk strings. Minus the bugs, this really is my favorite time of year, especially now that we live in the country. I questioned if it would compare to the wonder of summer in our new place, but it does.

A blurry, but colorful iPhone photo taken at the end of my run.

I thought these beetles were spider eggs from afar. Much happier they were beetles.

Not very happy about the evening's work

The change from warm to cool temperatures obviously requires a change in wardrobe. I'm loving my jeans and long sleeve t-shirts again. For kids who grow so quickly, new clothes and shoes are almost always in order at this time of year. Fortunately there are a lot of good sales (every other e-mail I get seems to be an offer from Baby Gap or Old Navy for 30% off). All of Anna's pants that weren't too big last year are more like capris this year, and her shirt sleeves are closer to three-quarter length. Shoes, too, are snug. Anna was so disappointed about her One Fish, Two Fish shoes no longer fitting, but we found some that are even better for this year. And, although it doesn't really "make sense" to buy a new "big girl" bike at this time of year, we did just that. Since yesterday morning, she's been riding up and down our perfectly lengthy driveway with a huge grin on her face.

Horton Hears A Who!

Think she's happy?

She looks so grown up

If only this warm weather could stick around a little bit longer!

Therapeutic Writing

2011-10-07T18:37:00.000-07:00

At eight o'clock in the morning

My eyes popped open at 1:30am last night. It may have been Anna's consistent coughing that woke me, but it was my brain that kept me going until sometime after 5:30am. It doesn't happen often, this insomnia thing. I've been feeling as though I've been managing the To Do's, the worries, the transitions of our lives pretty well, especially with the extra miles I've put in training for this weekend's 10K. Running, especially on the picturesque roads by our house, has been wonderfully therapeutic. Last night, though, the race became fuel for my overactive mind as well. Yesterday I started feeling that tickle in my throat that comes with the early stages of a cold, and I wondered...will I be hacking the entire 6.2 miles? How will I meet my pace goal if I can't breath?

The truth is, there is a lot happening in our lives right now. I've been trying out temporary denial and ignoring the impending changes, because that's just not something I usually do, and I know I could benefit from it on some level. Usually I process and talk and over-think and worry, which isn't great either. I've always believed that pushing our "stuff" in a closet doesn't work so well, and usually results in an explosion, much like the top blowing off the pressure cooker. I think that's what happened to me last night. No amount of reading, getting out of bed, eating a snack, browsing on my phone, meditating, deep breathing, counting sheep worked to quiet my manic mind.

Around 4:30, I started thinking, "Why did I not get up and WRITE about all this stuff going through my head?" I guess it was because I kept thinking I'd be sure to fall asleep soon. Even as I'm writing this, I'm absolutely sure I'm going to sleep better tonight, having it down "on paper." THAT always works, and I'm not sure why I haven't done more journaling to help me through it all.

While my first 10K, the growing To Do list (how does it grow in the middle of the night when you are doing nothing?) and the busy weeks ahead (one of which includes our first trip without Anna), Anna's consistent night-time coughing, people I need or want to call or e-mail for one reason or another, and the fortunate predicament of considering among many preschools to nurture Anna's development may have helped tip the scales in the direction of overwhelm, it's bigger stuff busting out of the closet when I'm trying to sleep. Am I really ready for another pregnancy? How will I cope a miscarriage if that happens again? How will we cope with another newborn and the sleepless nights (and the colic... surely the next one won't have colic!)? How will I DO this? Are we willing to take on the risks that seem so different this time around? Recently Blake and I learned from some testing I had done for unrelated symptoms that I have an antibody in my blood that puts our fetus at higher than normal risk for a heart block, a heart defect that could be fatal, but more likely could require a pacemaker for our tiny little baby. How do we move forward with this information? How do we make a "good" decision with so much uncertainty?

This is what kept me up last night. Fortunately, the good things, the present-moment things like my husband and my daughter, the fall beauty and unseasonable warmth that surrounds us made today a day that I did not have to drag myself through. Somehow, I had energy, and for the most part, I smiled. With the sun up, I remembered that we'll all be OK, no matter what.

Today

2011-10-04T16:38:00.000-07:00

Anna woke in the middle of the night sounding like a barking seal, and while she snuggled up in bed with us, finally falling asleep with her feet at our heads, there were a number of thoughts rolling around in my brain. Of course there were concerned-for-my-daughter-thoughts, but there were also thoughts about how this may very well be the last week of nice weather we'll see in a very long time, and I so don't want to miss the opportunity to be outside.

So, when Anna rallied a bit during the day, we spent as much time as we could in the yard. We ate lunch on the deck. Anna played in the grass while I did the lunch dishes. And, for two hours this afternoon I pulled weeds while Anna supervised and played in the yard. She wasn't her usual cheerful self even with the glorious weather...until we found a beautiful caterpillar that truly brightened her day and mine.

This was the scene on the front lawn...notice the tent Anna received for her birthday from Kyle, Lisa, Ellie and Jose. Isn't it cool?! Anna wanted to take her caterpillar inside.

Admiring her temporary pet.

She couldn't seem to get close enough.

Oh What a Night

2011-10-02T17:25:00.000-07:00

December, 1963 (Oh, What a Night) is one of my favorite old songs (OK, I have a lot of favorite songs from a lot of genres - I'm not too picky when it comes to music, as long as it's not heavy metal). Until Saturday night, I had no idea what the song was really about, I've just always loved the energy of it and that it makes me want to dance. On Saturday my dad and Jessica took me to a matinee of the Jersey Boys where I finally learned the story behind the song. The fact that everyone else in the auditorium was seated (and didn't even seem to be bobbing their heads) did not keep me from dancing and singing in my seat (nor did it stop Jessica). Maybe it's because I was the youngest in the crowd? Regardless, the show was amazing and the company was great!

Saturday actually started off with a windy, but empowering, 5.5 mile run. The day ended with my parents, Blake, and I savoring the tasting menu at Logan until way late in the night. The show fell in between, and while we were clapping our hands to the music, Anna and Blake had a house full of visitors. Mo J came over so she could babysit in the evening, and our much-missed babysitter and friend Katie came for a visit with her fiance, Saleem, and Iryna, the Ukrainian fellow who is staying with them in Chicago. Anna was in heaven.

It was A Very Good Day. Thanks to everyone that made it possible.

Fall Fun

2011-09-27T20:01:00.000-07:00

If you've never been to a corn maze, go now. Blake, Anna, and I stopped at the corn maze just down the road on our way home from the Saturday's birthday party, and it was a surprisingly good time. We actually made it through the entire maze without using the map - it took us a good hour and a bit of team work. Anna was a big helper, motivated entirely by the farm animals in the barn at the end of the maze. We were surprised to find a gigantic corn box (literally, a huge box filled with corn) to play in as well as a slide built into a mountain of a haystack when we finally found the end. Obviously, this was a phenomenal picture-taking opportunity.

In the corn box.

You can guess who took this one.

I couldn't get over how tall the corn really is (it doesn't seem so high when driving next to it on the road).

Family photo by our friend, neighbor, farmer Ryan...we're still dressed for the birthday party at the club.

An arial photo of the actual maze.

Thirty-Five, Thirty-Two

2011-09-26T13:13:00.000-07:00

Today I turn thirty-five, and Blake turns thirty-two. For some reason, thirty-five seems like a pivotal age. Even as I say that I'm thirty-five, I don't quite believe it. As of right now, I'm be closer to forty than thirty. Really? When did this happen? I've moved through the last ten years, especially, impossibly quickly. I don't necessarily have any ill feelings about getting older, particularly if I could slow down the passage of time. It does feel like this year has shown me a few more aches and pains (not to mention wrinkles and deteriorating eye sight) that often seem to go along with the aging process. Mostly when I think about aging I have hope that, as I get older, I will, indeed, get wiser. I am hopeful that I will relax more, stress less, rejoice more in uncertainty, worry less about what other people think, be a little more zen and a bit more enlightened. I know I have to work on it, but I hear that some of it just comes naturally with a life longer lived. I have hope.

* * * * *

Blake and I enjoyed a very full, very fun birthday weekend together. I don't think we could have packed more in! Whether it's my aging mind or just the way our memories fade, I can't remember the details of so many birthdays passed, and I don't want to forget the details of this one. Here it is, the play-by-play:

:: Friday Blake took the afternoon off to golf with Papa J, who also celebrated a birthday this week. After Blake stopped back at home to say goodnight, he met Blair for a night out in Ann Arbor. With Daddy gone, Anna and I enjoyed our second ever girls' "TV dinner" night, with burgers, kale chips, and cupcakes eaten on TV trays while watching Rio. Then, after Anna's head hit the pillow, I pampered myself with an at-home facial, and I stayed up way too late sewing (and loving it). Blake rolled in at 3:30am, just as Anna rolled out of her bed and woke me with a thud and a scream. We all snuggled up in Anna's bed together for a while, until it was just too crowded to sleep.

I LOVE Anna's homemade cards for Blake and me.

:: Saturday morning we ate scrambled eggs and grapefruit after watching our wedding video AGAIN (which Anna continues to request). Anna and I wrapped Daddy's gifts from her, then I headed out for my 5-miler while Blake and Anna went out to do some last minute shopping. Anna couldn't wait to give Blake the games she picked out and the elaborate picture she painted, so he opened his presents before our friend's afternoon birthday party. On our way home from the party, we stopped just a mile or so from our house to tackle the corn maze carved out by our neighbor farmer, Ryan (tons of pictures of this to come). After a lot of walking (and carrying), we came home for dinner. Anna devoured mac n cheese then quickly snuggled in her bed early while Blake crafted an elaborate meal (baked brie, purple mashed potatoes, braised greens, short ribs, apple fritters) from Thomas Keller's Ad Hoc cookbook.

:: Sunday we finally relaxed a bit. I opened my gift from Anna (a gift card for us to go to the movies!), we cleaned up, Blake mowed the lawn, and we stayed in our PJ's until almost lunch time. We enjoyed another birthday party on Sunday afternoon (with a jumping castle), and since Anna refused to nap yet again, she was in bed early enough for us to have some time to ourselves in the evening. Blake chose football, and I chose some online shopping.

:: Tonight, I get to have my night out. I'm having a lovely dinner with a girlfriend while Daddy spends the evening with Anna. I've had numerous birthday calls and wishes and cards, and I feel so blessed and loved. All-in-all, I'm feeling pretty good about turning thirty-five. BUT, I think I might just stay this age for the next few years. I think it's going to be a good one.

Sewing Again

2011-09-25T12:07:00.000-07:00

I'm finally sewing again! I finished my last small project in May, and then we had to pack, work on the new house, and move. I've had fabric washed and ready to make this skirt, which my sister-in-law shared with me long ago. Anna and I worked on it this week, and it felt so good to have a project again, especially now that I have a sewing space that isn't in the dining room!

The new sewing space in the basement, with natural light and TV. Still need something on the walls, though (we have one picture up in out entire house after 3 months!)

The Twirly Skirt

Anna modeling her new attire.

I dug out these old photos from May when I made eye pillows as gifts. I'm thinking I need one of these for me now.

Anna seemed to like it, too.

Toy Party

2011-09-24T10:06:00.000-07:00

Taken by Anna during the party.

Anna has been quite busy around the house the last few days. While much of her time is spent "flying" due to her not-so-recent obsession with Rio, and now, birds of all kinds, she discovered a new love for party planning. Maybe she's been inspired by the two birthday parties we are attending this weekend. Whatever the inspiration, a horde of her stuffed animals and dolls gathered to honor Mrs. Potato Head yesterday and today at a party in her honor. Anna made sure there were party favors for everyone and cake as well. After organizing the participants and necessary objects, I overheard her say something to the effect of, "How are you liking the cake?" and "Is everything OK for you?" When she leaves the party to join us at the dinner table, she's periodically checking on the festivities, and when she sees me watching her watching the party, she bashfully attempts to hold back the enormous smile on her face (something I see her do a lot when she seems to be feeling a little exposed or embarrassed or even proud). It's SO cute.

It's not like I'm hosting a bunch of parties around here, so I'm not sure where she's learned her hostess skills, but she's definitely onto something. Maybe she's discovered a natural strength!

Discovery

2011-09-23T10:00:00.000-07:00

Anna and I were checking for fairies in the fairy house yesterday afternoon when we discovered these apples in the sheltering tree. This is the biggest bunch on the whole thing - there are maybe 3 or 4 more rather sad looking apples, but we were so excited anyway. I can't believe we never noticed them before now. Anna picked one good looking one to show Daddy, which we have yet to taste.

The leaves on this tree are all spotted and almost diseased-looking. Anyone know how you tell if an apple tree is sick? It seems like it would have more apples if it were healthy. I have a lot to learn about the trees and plants in our new yard!

Meet Me in New York

2011-09-22T11:47:00.000-07:00

In a few short weeks, Blake and I will be taking our first adults-only vacation since before Anna's birth. We bought my flights last night - it's finally official, and I'm finally letting myself get excited (and nervous).

For months, we've pondered a getaway for ourselves, never committing to anything. Where? When? For how long? Time, money, and so many other factors kept us from sealing the deal. Then we found out that Blake would be traveling to Madrid in October on business, and it felt like now or never (we have a little timeline in mind for our immediate future).

While we entertained meeting in Paris following his conference, after much deliberation we decided to meet in New York City instead. We'll actually arrive into JFK at the same time, share a taxi to the hotel, and spend three luxurious nights devouring good food and wine, SLEEPING, and exploring the city on foot. I couldn't be happier about our chosen location and itinerary (even though Paris is high on my list of places to visit, I don't think I could rest there knowing I only had two or three days to take it all in).

Blake and I have never done NYC together. It will be a completely new kind of vacation for the two of us and one that, I expect, will be immeasurably restorative for us individually and as a couple. I can't wait!

Fairy House

2011-09-20T18:03:00.000-07:00

This is how Anna and I spent the afternoon on this perfect early fall day. I want more days like this - exploring our back yard together, no place to rush off to, nurturing our minds, bodies and imaginations in nature. I'm so grateful.

Notice the little nut shells Anna carefully placed inside so that the fairies can have a place to sleep.

Betsy's Visit

2011-09-19T11:11:00.000-07:00

Saturday afternoon my dear friend Betsy drove all thew way from Grand Ledge with her three remarkable kids, Violet, Calvin, and Hazel to visit with Anna and I. This might not seem extraordinary; however, it was such a special treat. Betsy is one of my girlfriends from college - one of six of us who reunite once per year. We don't see each other often, and it feels like vacation to be able to see her, or any of the girls, outside of our annual gathering.

I've often thought how strange it is to grow up talking to girlfriends every day (sometimes for hours on the phone or at least every second during the walk between classes) and then living with them in college, (which means uninterrupted support systems for each other, reliable ears for venting about boys, school, or ANYTHING, and anytime oozing over your favorite movie hunk - not thinking of anyone in particular, Betsy)! Then, suddenly, we leave college, get jobs, maybe get married and have kids, and it's not so easy to connect so often...definitely not every day, anytime we like. Something we've known for our entire lives is no longer there in the same way, and it is, at least for me, something that is often missed.

So, I'm just plain grateful that Betsy and her kids came over this weekend. It was such a joy to spend time with her and get to know her kids. Betsy and I spent a little time catching up, but with four young ones to attend to, we spent more time overseeing craft projects, playing outside, and feeding hungry mouths. They were four adorable mouths though...check them out.

Anna

Violet

Hazel

Calvin

My New Running Partner

2011-09-18T18:11:00.000-07:00

As I climbed the stairs this morning to slide into my running clothes, Anna declared that she wanted to go for a run with me. So we found her some black leggings, a tank top, and a black shirt, just like Mommy's, and with our white running shoes, we jogged down the street to the edge of our neighborhood. Daddy even came the quarter mile out, and when I left to do my four miles, Anna and Daddy ran the quarter mile back. She was smiling so proudly the whole time - so was I.

I love that she wanted to run with me today, for so many reasons. Just one of them stems from my hopeful (maybe delusional?) visions of us running together in the future. My dad and I run together whenever we get the opportunity, and it's quality time with him that I cherish. Even if we don't talk the entire way, it's just time for me to be with my dad. From what I know of his perspective, it's pretty special when you're the parent, too. I'm sure there'll be a time in those teenage years where running with mom is anything but cool; but, way down the road, when I'm cool again, it could happen. And, if it does, I'll be so grateful.

So She Knows She's Not Alone

2011-09-15T17:36:00.000-07:00

Anna and I were out to dinner last night with Mo D and Aunt Kaity, and for the first time ever she had a screaming fit in a restaurant, because I wouldn't let her put her feet on the table. I picked her up and took her to the restroom to attempt to calm and talk to her (as well as prevent wet pants), and inevitably, a woman walks in and comments on how cute Anna is. When she asks her age and I tell her that Anna is three, she says, "No more terrible two's!" And, if you've ever had a three-year-old, you might agree with me when I simply replied, "It's the terrible threes."

Anna, of course, is not terrible. It's her behavior that is, at times, terrible. This behavior is probably even more shocking for us, because she has always been fairly compliant and responsive. While the sweet, kind, gentle girl that we all know is still there (she shares unprompted "I love you's" countless times per day, she worries about anyone when they are sad or hurt or sick), another girl has taken up residence in her body, too. Mostly, this girl comes out just at home and just for Mommy or Daddy when she is thwarted from doing what she wants to do. She ignores, screams, hits, kicks, and says awful things to me. I often find myself walking away in tears wondering how this can be normal, but in my conversations with other moms, it seems it may be rather typical of three-year-olds. That does make it a bit more tolerable - a bit. It's also challenging, because I generally feel like I'm ill-equipped to manage this effectively. My intense emotional reactions are difficult to squelch, and my tears and raised voice are not doing wonders for extinguishing her behavior.

While I rarely turn to books these days, I'm at that point, because we're beyond time outs, and removal of special items or privileges isn't working anymore. I've ordered the highly recommended book Parenting with Love and Logic, and we've instituted a marble jar (thank you, Stephanie!) Anna gets marbles in her jar for good behavior like listening, asking politely, cooperating with morning or bedtime routines, and marbles are taken out of her jar for less-than-favorable behaviors like kicking, screaming, hitting. When her jar is full, she gets something special. To be fair, and to improve upon our own behavior, Blake and I also now have our own marble jars, which we expect will shed some light on the frequency of our own three-year-old-like behaviors.

It's a challenging time. While I'm trying to stay focused on the happy, heart-warming moments that come with each day, sometimes the fighting just gets me down. I expect, though, that I won't remember this stuff all that clearly ten or twenty years from now; the brighter moments will outshine the darker ones. While that is, for the most part, a good thing, I do think it could be helpful for Anna to look back on this someday, if she has a three-year-old, and she calls me up crying to say she just doesn't know what to do with him or her. Even if I'm wearing the rose-colored glasses of a woman well beyond child-bearing years, I can point her here and reassure her, as my mom did for me last night, that she's not alone.

A Good Old Fashioned Tea Party

2011-09-13T17:57:00.000-07:00

One cannot underestimate the value of girl time. Emily, Harper, and Crosby invited Anna and me over for a tea party last Saturday, and it was an absolutely lovely morning for just us girls. Anna and Harper painted wooden picture frames while we moms caught up; we lunched on heart-shaped sandwiches, fruit skewers, veggie sticks, and of course, tea; the girls frosted and devoured cupcakes; and they did a little dress up with some of Emily's grandmother's vintage hats. I know I've said it before, and I'm going to say again that I'm so grateful to have a friend like Emily. Thank you, Emily, for the girl time and for the beautiful tea party.

The ingredients for a perfect tea party:

A beautiful centerpiece

Tea (or hot water with honey and lemon)

Two photo-snapping moms

Heart-shaped sandwiches with a choice of sunflower butter with honey, homemade jam, or marshmallow fluff.

Name cards and fine china.

Cupcakes (with lollipops!!)

Fresh fruit skewers.

Hats!

A Day for Baseball

2011-09-11T17:40:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting in our den editing photos from our first family Tigers game, and I've become mesmerized by a show that remembers 9/11. I've tried to put my thoughts and feelings into words about this day, now and ten years ago, but it all sounds wrong (pained, grateful, sorry, humbled?), even inappropriate. Then and now, while my life has witnessed the impact 9/11 has had on our country, I was spared the loss of family or friends, and because of this, my words don't seem right. Even now, as I watch the events from ten years ago on TV, they seem surreal, like something from a movie.

Today, Blake, Anna and I were fortunate to attend a Detroit Tigers Baseball Game together. As we entered the stadium, we peeked into the park before making our way to the carousel. I was breathless and tearful as we watched over 400 public service members walk onto the field and as we listened to the beautiful, harmonic voices of four uniformed men who shared with us their National Anthem. It felt right being there today, watching America's game with my family, remembering our country's heroes.

The view while we waited in line.

And the view from our seats.

Obviously, we hit the ferris wheel.

And, we found Red Robin, who Anna at once declared was scary and wanted to touch him.

And the carousel. Between the rides and trips to the concession stand for beer, frozen lemonade, chips, and fries, we didn't see THAT much of the game.

Not your typical horse-drawn carousel.

Blair and Carolyn's Wedding

2011-09-10T19:35:00.000-07:00

One of a couple carpet picnics and videos during the wedding weekend.

Brothers

A dip in the lake was required at the rehearsal dinner given the sweltering heat and humidity.

Two peas in a pod. Katie, Blake's cousin, and Anna really enjoyed each other's company.

We took a break from the rehearsal to find clovers outside the church.

A happy practice round.

Father and daughter.

The Richards and Minnett women on the groom's side at a pre-rehearsal brunch.

Anna with the gorgeous couple.

Of course, Anna got her hands on the camera to take some pictures of the Mo's.

I love this one...when the photographer saw Anna clicking away, he came to get some pics of her. Anna mimicked his every move. I can't wait to see the photos he got of her!

Dancing with Papa Mox. I LOVE this one!

Still Here

2011-09-08T20:38:00.000-07:00

Somehow seven days have passed since my last post. The long weekend was a blur of laughter, dancing, time with family and friends, driving, and celebrating. It's taken me Tuesday and Wednesday to recover from all the fun.

I know there are more than a couple of people awaiting photos. I've downloaded them, sorted through the poor shots, and just have to edit them now. For now, one of my favorites will have to do.

I have a few shots that I took after this one, after I realized my settings weren't right, but the way she's looking and standing in this overexposed pic just melted my heart. Anna was a spectacular flower girl (she surprised us by actually walking down the aisle on wedding day!)

Something Old, Something New

2011-09-01T17:48:00.000-07:00

This weekend, on Sunday, September 4th, Blake and I will celebrate our 6th anniversary. This weekend, on Sunday, September 4th, Blair and Carolyn will be married.

Blake is packing what he can in the car as I write (which cannot be a lot, I haven't packed an article of clothing yet). We leave first thing in the morning - Blake, Anna, Mo D, and me - for Rochester, NY for a long wedding weekend celebration, one that will be, for me, reminiscent of the party six years ago. While this weekend is all about Blair and Carolyn, and we are SO excited for their special day, I'm also feeling particularly grateful that our anniversary and their wedding coincide. There are so many wonderful ways to celebrate an anniversary (last year was very different, AND so enjoyable), but being at the wedding of two people who you adore with your family and friends surrounding you sounds pretty ideal to me. Yes, I'm a romantic - weddings always make me fall in love with Blake all over again.

Today Anna and I watched our wedding video to prepare her for the walk down the aisle this weekend. Tears streamed down my cheeks as I watched Blake and I exchange vows with the people we love surrounding us, as I watched us dance the night away, such pure and true happiness on our faces. I can't wait to see that pure and true happiness on Blair and Carolyn's faces this weekend. Congratulations to you two, and Happy Anniversary to my sweet husband!

When She Wants To

2011-08-30T12:02:00.000-07:00

Anna had her first swimming lesson today. She loved it of course - it was made evident by the sullen look on her face when she had to get out of the pool after just 30 minutes. She was eager to try all of the new toys and games Miss Alex offered in the pool...as long as she did not have to go under water. She's adamant that she not have to do this (even though I know she wants to - I just think she wants to do it when SHE decides to do it).

Anna also didn't want to take a nap when I wanted her to today. Instead, she asked to read stories and play quietly in her room. After an hour of talking (some to me, some to herself) and playing, I heard her call out "Mommy." I went in to get her a few minutes later and she was fast asleep on the carpet, having decided that she did want to take a nap after all. I snapped a picture with my phone, proof to remind her that she can sleep with lights on (when she wants to)!

Anna's First Hair Cut

2011-08-29T11:10:00.000-07:00

Today was the day. Anna needed a little trim before Uncle Blair and Aunt Carolyn's wedding, as she has the very important role of flower girl next weekend! Anna was adamant that she did not want to go to the salon, no matter how fun I made it sound. Despite her hesitation, she was so brave, and it took just minutes for her tentative feelings to turn around. She loved the squishy chair, the fish cape, Alisa (who did a wonderful job with her), the fact that she got to have her hair blown out just like mommy does (I did not ask them to do this, and frankly, I missed her curls), and the lollipop at the end.

Is it silly that I was sentimental? She just seemed so grown up sitting in that chair, enjoying a morning at the spa. I had visions of mom-daughter pedicures in the not-so-distant future and Anna begging to get her hair highlighted or her ears pierced. When she does, I'll be opening the tiny envelope with her little blond curls, wondering where our toddler went.

Still wondering about this hair cut thing.

Thoroughly enjoying it now! Can you believe I didn't bring my camera to Anna's first hair cut? Thank goodness for iPhones.

Can you believe this girl?

The Last Days of Summer

2011-08-28T19:49:00.000-07:00

While it's still officially summer, I can feel autumn creeping in. The cool morning air, the geese honking overhead, and even the occasional orange or red-leafed tree remind me each day that I need to savor the warm sun on my face and the feel of the grass under my bare feet. We've tried this week to do just that.

Anna made two trips to the pool this week. I'm feeling pretty bummed that it may have been our last swim in the outdoor pool for the season. It's really been the cure for even the toughest days when Anna is acting all of her three years, and I, despite my almost 35 years, am also acting like a three-year-old. Besides that, and more importantly, Anna has become such a confident, happy little fish, and she's really made all of her progress on her own. It's been just plain fun. This week is the first of swimming lessons at a new indoor swimming pool in Ann Arbor, and I hope she finds as much joy in it as she's found in the pool all summer long.

We have a new toy that's helping us enjoy the last days of summer. I never pictured Blake on a riding lawn mower when I married him almost 6 years ago (next Sunday!), but he looks good on one. And when Anna is riding along, with her noise-reduing ear muffs of course, it's an even better look.

In grand finale style, we decided to do our first (annual?) backyard campout last night. The idea of it was more fun than the actual event, but I have hopes that future years will see improvement. I wouldn't trade the snuggles shared in our sleeping bags, the excitement in Anna's voice and on her face, or the learning (in retrospect, there are a number of things we could have done differently to make it more "successful"). We didn't last long in the tent, and it had nothing to do with bugs, temperature, or discomfort. After settling in too late at 9:30pm way overtired and excited and hyped up on marshmallows and star gazing, Anna was still flopping around like a fish out of water after nearly an hour. She wanted to go inside, then she didn't, then she wanted to go inside again. We were bargaining and making threats (if you're don't lay down and at least try to rest, we're going inside!) When we went in at 10:30pm, I promised a tearful Anna that we'd spend time in the tent in the morning, and she finally fell quiet around 11pm. I really am looking forward to trying again next year.

Preparations (required popsicles and patience)

Uncle Blair and Aunt Carolyn came over for burgers and a bonfire, and as always, Anna got her hands on the camera.

Not sure what she's doing, but it's a cute photo.

A bonfire is never complete without very sticky marshmallows.

Snuggled in...at least for a little while.

I love autumn. It has always been my favorite season, and I'm usually more than ready for it, but something about summer this year has me wanting a little bit more. Maybe, just maybe, we can squeeze in on more day at the pool before I start thinking about the fun things on my autumn list.

Dairy-Free Berry Crisp

2011-08-26T17:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we picked more berries with our berry-picking friends. The raspberries were ripe and ready for little hands to pick and little mouths to eat. When we picked blueberries a few weeks ago, I adapted a recipe I found online to make a dairy-free blueberry and peach crisp. It was amazing, so I decided to do something similar with the raspberries.

Dairy Free Berry Crisp

4 cups berries (I used blueberries and raspberries this time. Last time I used half blueberries and half peaches)

Juice of 1/2 of a lemon

2 Tbsp whole wheat flour

2 Tbsp cane sugar

1/4 tsp ground ginger (or use 1 Tbsp grated fresh if you have it)

Pinch of salt

Topping

1.5 cups old fashioned rolled oats

1/2 cup wheat germ

3/4 tsp salt

1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/2 cup dark brown sugar

1/3 cup coconut oil (melted)

1/3 cup maple syrup

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

In a large bowl, combine the berries, lemon juice, ginger, sugar, and flour. Gently fold ingredients together, and pour mixture into a 9x9 glass baking dish.

In a separate bowl, combine the topping ingredients, and then spread the mixture over the berries.

Bake for 35-40 minutes.

Vacation, Part 3

2011-08-24T19:09:00.000-07:00

Finally, the final installment of our vacation photos. It feels like so long ago now, I'm struggling to remember what we did for the last two days. I think it went something like this:

A trip to the state park to wander the skyline trail.

Photo courtesy of Anna.

Running down sand dunes, and carrying a little girl back up.

Wandering around downtown Ludington, telling Anna stories about our childhood days there, how Daddy and Mommy met when they were just 7 and 10 years old, how we played at this beach, walked this pier, and watched the sunset here more than 20 years ago.

Eating pizza at Sportsmans, breakfast at The Old Hamlin, and ice cream and sorbet at the House of Flavors.

Another Anna shot.

Vacation, Part 2

2011-08-22T18:31:00.000-07:00

Sunday we drove to the west side of the state to visit my brother, sister-in-law, and two nieces. Grilling, drinking cold beers and new cocktails, spending hours at the beach, bike-riding, and just generally relaxing with each other - that was our agenda. Thank you, Kyle, Lisa, Ellie, and Josie for hosting and spending time with us!

The first night...

The kids' table.

Sweet, silly sisters!

This girl LOVES riding bikes!

Days at the beach...